Discovering College
by Ice Princess Xia
Summary: One drunken night sets the course for an interesting first year of college for Matt and Tai. Can Tai save Matt from a downward spiral of depression? Or did he put him there?TAITO,underage drinking,depressingsuicidal thoughts,VERY ADULT CONTENT and CUSSING
1. Chapter 1

Hey Everyone! Well, this is a new story from Ice! Hooray! Don't worry for any readers of Kidnapped, I'm still working hard on that one, this is just something I've been working on for a while. I am really excited about this story and I hope readers get to be as well.

Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon or anything in affiliation with it.

WARNINGS: TAITO! Underage college drinking! Slight tendency to bash Sora! If you have very strict morals or just love Sora as a character, you might want to turn back now.

Matt's POV

"Aw, come on Matt! Come with us! It's going to be fun, I swear; I mean really, you'll be with me! How could that not be fun?" I sighed as Tai ranted on and thought more about what he was proposing in the first place. It was our first year in college and Tai was already a big face in the drinking scene; he started basically the second after his parents left him here. Of course, the oldest of the digidestined had stuck together and we were all at the same college where everyone but me had already begun drinking. Even Izzy and Joe would drink on occasion with Tai and Sora but I generally stayed away. Seeing the effects of alcohol on my father had set a horrible template for alcohol and while I could tolerate other people's drinking, I wasn't sure if I was quite ready to dive in yet which, of course, brings me back to Tai who is still talking to himself.

"I mean, so what if his head got a little stuck, we greased him down and got him out of there quickly enough, so what do you say Matt? Will you come and drink with us?" I raised an eyebrow at my wild-haired friend and rolled my eyes.

"If I say yes, will you finally stop talking?" Without a word, Tai nodded to me enthusiastically and I chuckled to myself at his goofy smile. Then beginning to walk away, I called back my answer to him.

"No thanks!" I could already see the pout that had found its way to Tai's face as I continued walking away, that is, until I was lifted from the ground and carried back in the direction I came.

"TAI! Put me DOWN!" Tai had thrown me over his shoulder and without a word just continued carrying me down the hallway of the dorm.

"Oh Yama…You should've know that if you say no to Taichi Kamiya….well….you just can't say no to me! You had to know that I have alternative methods of getting you to come with me." Growling under my breath, I started to kick despite the fear that Tai would actually drop me but still determined to fight my way out the situation. Tai merely chuckled and held me tighter until he put me down in the back of his car which was conveniently parked right outside the dorm. Sighing in defeat, I gave in and looked up at my smirking friend.

"Alright, if I agree to go will you at least give me some time to change into some better clothes and get ready?" My eyes widened in fear as Tai giggled like a school girl and hugged me before letting me back into the dorm to change.

* * *

A half hour later, I heard Tai groan loudly for the thousandth time that night. I shot a look into my room where he was sprawled out on my bed and pretending as though he was dying of boredom.

"Maaaaaaatt, are you ready yet?? I want to go and get out of here! They've probably already started drinking without us. Hell, they're probably already drunk! How long does it take you to change?????????" I chuckled at Tai and continued styling my hair to its normal perfection.

"Well, if you hadn't forced me to make you something to eat, I might've been ready a while ago so blame your stomach." Tai then joined my reflection in the mirror.

"Hey, it is never good to drink on an empty stomach."

"How would you know? I don't think yours is EVER empty!" I dodged a flying tube of toothpaste and laughed at Tai's grumpy face; it was just too easy to get under his skin. His face then changed back to a pout.

"Can we please go? Your hair looks amazing, please?????" Rolling my eyes, I grabbed my cell, my keys and some money.

"Lead the way." Tai took a moment to cheer to himself in success before finally heading out the door, with me following close behind.

* * *

I looked over at Tai's excited face as I slammed his car door and made my way up the driveway. Tai grabbed the soda out of the back seat and eagerly ran up to the front door, pushing it open and saying his hello's to everyone inside. Taking my time, I listened to the lively crowd as I continued my way to the door. Tai poked his head out and found me standing right outside.

"Come on!" Suddenly he grabbed me by my arm and yanked me inside. On my way into the living room I noticed a bedroom to my left and then turned to see everyone on the couch and chairs in the living room staring at me. Sora immediately got up from her seat and ran over to hug me, spilling a tad of her beer on the way over.

"Matt! I'm so glad you could make it!" I gagged for a moment before returning her hug; she absolutely reeked of alcohol.

"Hey Sora, nice to see you too." Sora pulled away to look me up and down once before stumbling a bit and then speaking again.

"Tai told me that he would get you to drink with us sooner or later." She flashed me a big smile before seeing someone else and running over to them. I looked over at Tai timidly before crossing my arms over my chest and looking back over everyone around me. Tai rolled his eyes at me and tugged on my arm again leading me into the next room.

This room seemed to have more promise and less drunk people. Only a few people were scattered across with most of them sitting and watching television on the far side of the room. Preferring the less crowded area, I took a seat on one of the couches. I watched as Tai said hello to a few of his buddies and then joined me on the couch. I was just glad that he hadn't left me to myself yet.

"Hey dude, sorry about Sora. I probably should have warned you that she gets pretty drunk and when she's that drunk she'll get really giddy and friendly, if you know what I mean." I chuckled a bit and shook my head thinking about it.

"No worries Tai. This whole thing is just weird though. I don't know if I want to drink anymore." I then received a whack on the arm followed by the pouty face.

"But Maaaaaaaaaaaaatt, you promised! I mean, if you're not going to do it now, you know I'll just get you to do it at some other party I drag you to. You might as well just get it over with! And besides, I'll stay with you the whole time. I won't let anything bad happen to you." I looked over to my friend and couldn't help but melt at the sad look on his face.

"Fine, fine, alright. I'll do it, but you'd better keep your promise. I don't want to be left alone." Tai nodded to my request and immediately handed me a beer while popping one for himself as well.

"Hey, but if you're drinking too, how are you going to remember that I'm even here?" Tai stopped chugging his beer and turned back to me with a look of disbelief.

"Oh Matt, you really need a schooling in all this. One beer is not going to do barely anything to me I've drank so much in the past few weeks. And don't worry; I'm only going to drink one or two. I've got your back so you can drink the rest of them." He flashed me a grin and waited for me to take a sip of my own.

(---)

Three beers later, I was pretty much wasted. Tai was always within five feet of me, but at this point I wasn't really in the right mind to care anymore. Many people had left so I wasn't as uncomfortable and even though I was wasted, the only of my motor skills that was significantly affected was my balance as I stumbled through the small house. Standing up from the couch Tai and I had been sitting on for the past hour, I walked back into the first room where I had seen Sora but sadly, she had left at this point…or so I thought. As I turned back around to go back to sit with Tai, Sora was suddenly right in front of me. I could tell that she was even more wasted than earlier.

"Um…hey Sora…what's up?" She put her face really close to mine and my eyes were burning from the amount of alcohol on her breath.

"Are you drunk yet Matty? 'Coz I'd r-really love to s-sh-share a secret with you, but-you, you have to be drunk first." Her words slurred but I could still understand her so I nodded merely because I was curious to find out what the secret was but before I knew it Sora had her arms behind my neck and she looked like she was about to go in for a kiss.

"Whoa, whoa…Sora…" I unlatched her arms and stepped to her side, stumbling a little, and spoke again, "I'm sorry but I don't feel that for you, not even when I'm drunk."

Sora moped for a moment before nodding to me. I started to walk away but felt as her foot slid between mine and I was immediately on the ground with her on top of me. My body instantly went tense and before I could do something stupid like my father would do, I curled into a ball as a defense mechanism. I felt as she tried to lick my ear and whispered things to me but I held my fist back until suddenly she was off of me and strong arms were tugging on my shoulders.

"Alright Sora, party's over. Somebody take her home?" I heard Tai's voice and right away I relaxed and started to stand. Fortunately when I fell again, Tai was there to catch me all over all over again. I looked up to him meekly. He smiled warmly back at me.

"Looks like the party's over for you too there buddy; you're toasted." I chuckled at his comment and blinked as my vision got blurry. Tai looked at me concerned for a moment and then began searching the crowd.

"Hey, Daryl?"

"Yo, Tai, what's up dude?"

"Hey, do you think my pal could sleep in your room tonight? He's not gonna make it back."

"Sure no problem, I'm probably gonna be out all night anyway. Just don't break anything." At this, Tai grinned a 'thank you' and looked back down to me.

"Ready to get up now?" I nodded to him and unsteadily got back to my feet. Tai slowly led the way to the room at the front of the house and I recognized it to be the first door on the left as we came in earlier that evening. Making sure I didn't fall over, he got me into the room and shut the door behind us. I took a look around and immediately noticed that the room was a mess. Clothes were everywhere, bursting from the dressers and the closet and covering the arm chair in the middle as well as the floor. The second thing I noticed was the very large bed by the window which was shortly followed by the doorway to the bathroom. Disregarding my balance issues for the moment, I made a leap for the bathroom. Once I got there I closed the door and began taking care of business.

"Matt! Are you okay in there?? You leapt like there was no tomorrow!" I flushed the toilet and washed my hands, opening the door to a very shocked Taichi.

"I just really had to pee, that's all." I shot him a big smile, sighed deeply, and then flung myself onto the mattress my eyes suddenly very droopy. I heard Tai chuckle and dared a glance up at him. I had to pause for a moment when I saw how much emotion was placed behind the look Tai was giving me but before I knew it, the moment was gone and Tai rolled his eyes at me and my drunkenness.

"What??" I stared Tai down as he sat on the bed next to my curled up body.

"Oh, nothing; just blackmail is all." At this, I shot into a sitting position.

"Hey, now that's not fair! You're the one that made me drink in the first place. You can't use this against me!" Tai started laughing at how much offense I was taking at his comment and I realized that the whole thing had been a trap to get him some blackmail. I glared daggers at him but when that didn't seem the stop his laughter, I then resorted to attacking him physically. We play wrestled for a while until my muscles grew too tired to fight anymore and he eventually had me pinned on the bed. I stared up at him, our breathing labored, and just waited for him to get off of me.

For the second time that night, I saw an intense amount of emotion in Tai's expression, but especially his eyes. I could tell that he was fighting himself about something, but yet again before I could figure it out, he had moved to the other side of the bed. Trying to laugh it off, I spoke.

"Ha, well, you won that round Kamiya but next time I'll get you." I tried to stand and would've fallen if not for Tai's arms catching me again.

"Dude, you are really trashed." I chuckled and nodded to Tai when I felt safe to stand on my own.

"Yeah, you can definitely tell if I lose to you in a fight." I flashed a smile to Tai as he stuck his tongue out at me and before he could reply, I changed the subject. "So are you even drunk at all?"

Tai shrugged, "I'm kind of tipsy. I had a real good buzz going there for a while, but it died down when I lost you." I raised my eyebrow at him to urge him to continue; sadly Tai didn't get the memo.

"When you lost me?" I reiterated. Tai looked down to fix his shoes as he spoke, meaning he was obviously hiding something from me.

"Yeah, when you left the couch and then five seconds later I found you with Sora trying to molest you." Ignoring the hint of jealousy in his voice for the moment, I couldn't help but put forth a comment.

"Yeah, is Sora always like that when she's drunk? Because flat-out, that was just creepy and actually, quite frightening." At this, Tai looked back up at me confused.

"Why was it frightening?" I shot him a look and he chuckled. "Okay, I know that having Sora, lifelong friend and member of the digidestined drunk and basically on top of you is really scary in itself, but there had to be something else for you, Ice Prince Yamato Ishida to say it was 'frightening.' So spill it."

At first, probably because of my drunken stupor, I had to think hard on how to answer this question. While Tai knew basically everything about me, there was one thing he didn't really know about; my father and his fight with alcohol. I mean, Tai knows that my father sometimes drinks excessively but I've never told anyone some of the consequences that he forced onto me, but my thoughts were interrupted by another question.

"Are you alright? I mean what? Do you like Sora or something?" I instantly paled and blinked in fear before looking Tai dead in the eye.

"Tai please don't ever say that again. It wasn't that, not at all." I faintly heard Tai sigh before I continued. "I just…thought that…I would hurt her if I tried to get her off of me."

"Hurt her, how?"

I fidgeted in my place and tried to finish this conversation, "I just…can't even tell my own strength now because of the alcohol. I thought I might've pushed her off me and into something. I don't know."

Tai must've noticed my uneasiness because he merely nodded and leaned back to lay down on the bed with his hands behind his head. I sighed to myself in relief and sat down next to him again. I glanced back at his face and noticed how pensive he looked.

"What are you thinking about?" Tai raised his eyebrows and shook his head at me before answering.

"Nothing really." I rolled my eyes.

"Yeah, right. I think I've known you long enough to know when you're thinking about something. I'm drunk Tai, not stupid." Tai smiled at this for a moment before shaking his head again. I raised an eyebrow and was about to ask again when Tai sat up quickly and ended up with his face very close to mine. My initial reaction was to move away but for some reason I didn't want to move. I felt Tai's breath on my face and took a deep breath of my own as I watched him slowly raise his hand until it finally touched my shoulder and he turned his face away.

"I'm sure that you'll tell me what's wrong when you're ready to Yama." I blinked at Tai as he smirked at me knowingly. "Just like you've known me long enough to know when I'm thinking, I've known you the same amount of time and I can tell just as much when you're hiding something."

I continued to blink like mad not really knowing what else to do. Eventually, Tai had shifted in his position and was about to stand.

"Tai?" Raising his eyebrows, he turned to me and his face was close to mine again. I didn't know what was coming over me but I was determined to figure it out somehow through my drunken stupor…until there was a knock on the door. Tai and I both blinked and shifted away from each other as Tai shook his head and moved to open the door.

I grimaced when I saw Sora's passed out body in the arms of some random guy I had never seen before.

"Dude, what the hell?" Tai seemed pretty upset at this arrival and grew even more-so when Sora was not-so-nicely dumped into Tai's arms.

"Yeah, um, dude, like, I was taking her back to my place but she just like all the sudden started talking about all this weird digi-something stuff to me and I dunno man. She mentioned your name and some other random crap, I just thought she was crazy but then she threw-up a few times and passed out. So I brought her back here." Tai looked at the guy in awe.

"Well, what do you expect me to do? Can't you just take her back to her dorm? Or your place?" The guy shrugged at him and turned to leave.

"She's your burden now dudes!" Tai's jaw dropped as he watched the guy walk off. If Tai could emit steam, this entire house would be foggy by now. With a sigh, Tai turned back to me.

"I guess it's time we all head to bed anyways, eh Tai?" I couldn't help but chuckle somewhat at the look of sheer annoyance on Tai's face as I got up to close the door and help him relocate Sora from his arms and into the bed. We placed her down gently on the side nearest to the bathroom just in case she woke up sick again.

"Damn…" I looked over at Tai, paused for a moment to stop seeing double, and asked why he was cursing.

"There's only one pillow and it's definitely not big enough for the three of us to sleep on." I looked down, saw the oddly very small pillow on the bed, and shrugged.

"Let Sora have it, I mean, she is the worst of us so she needs a little comfort." Tai smiled at me for a moment and nodded before moving to put the pillow under Sora's head. He then shifted to lie down in the middle of the bed and motioned for me to turn out the lights and lay down on the other side of him. After turning out the lights, I carefully made my way to the other side of the bed, tripping on some clothes on the way and finally crawling up the side of the bed that was nearest to the wall. Outside the window, a street lamp was lit brightly so I was still able to see at least what most of everything was. I sat up for a moment to get my balance back and then I leaned back and surprisingly felt Tai's arm behind my head. I looked over at Tai who was lying on his back with his left arm outstretched.

"Tai? What are you doing?" Tai looked over at me and rolled his eyes.

"I told you that I would take care of you and there are no other pillows. I mean, unless you want nothing to lean your head on."

"No, no. I do. Thanks Tai." I flashed him a smile before laying my head back down on his arm and closing my eyes. In doing so, I remembered just how drunk I was as even in the darkness of my eyelids everything was spinning. I placed a hand to my forehead and made a disgruntled noise. Tai immediately turned towards me asking me if I was okay.

"Yeah, it's just everything is spinning…" I opened my eyes and found that Tai's face was close to mine again. I stared into his concerned eyes and breathed heavily as my focus regained itself. Tai blinked slowly as he stared back at me and I realized that he had his hand behind my back to hold me steady. I looked down and away from his eyes for a moment.

"Are you okay? Matt?" When I didn't respond, Tai moved so that I had to stare into his chocolate eyes again. It was my turn to blink slowly as butterflies arose in my stomach. Remembering his question, I nodded and breathed heavier. I felt as Tai's hand slowly slid up my back to my shoulder and following through up to my neck.

Cupping the back of my neck, Tai stared deeply into my eyes silently questioning me. All I could do was stare back into his eyes as Tai slowly closed the distance between our lips. The kiss was tender at first as our eyes closed and our lips glided across each other until I felt Tai's grip on my neck slowly intensify. I moved my hand to Tai's lower back and pulled him closer to me as our passionate kiss progressed.

It felt right. Was it wrong of me to want it? I knew it was happening but I didn't know what I was doing; I knew that I was kissing Tai, but does that mean that I like him? I'm not quite sure but I knew that I never wanted that moment to end.

Nevertheless, it did. Tai instantly pulled away from me as Sora shifted in her sleep next to him. Frightened tremendously, I moved away from Tai and listened as they conversed for a few moments.

"Hey Sora, you okay?"

"Yeah…I'm okay Tai, just really tired. Can I go back to my own bed?"

"No, I'm sorry Sora you're going to have to stay here for the night you're too drunk to walk back."

"Oh…damn. Then can we go to get breakfast in the morning?"

"Sure Sora but you have to go back to sleep now, okay?"

"Mmkay…g'night Tai…" I could feel as Sora shifted on the bed and as Tai was moving back towards me.

"Matt?" I closed my eyes to make it seem like I had passed out. Don't get me wrong, I wanted to make out with Tai some more but I was too confused and too drunk to think. I heard Tai sigh to himself before lying back down.

What am I going to do?

* * *

Well? What do you readers out there think? Kind of a cliffhanger, what will Matt do??

The CONTINUATION of this story depends on YOU. More than likely, I will continue to write this story no matter what but depending on the amount of feedback I get will really determine if I post more chapters here so do your part!

Please Review!!!

Hope it was enjoyable and thank you for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of Digimon though I am determined in life to find someone who is just like Joe, marry him and keep him for the rest of my life.

Author Note (Please Read): Thank you SO MUCH to all of those that reviewed the first chapter of this story!!! I hope that this chapter lives up to your expectations. It's a little shorter but I think it still has the same amount of content.

I do want to mention that the beginning of this story was inspired by events that actually occurred in my life my freshman year of college.

I would also like to mention that there are several times in this chapter where Matt is really thinking to himself but because it is from Matt's POV, I didn't bother putting it all in quotations but in case anyone didn't understand, he's just talking to himself because he's so confused.

WARNINGS: Lots of TAITO! Guy on Guy pairing and making out a lot! Also, don't forget my not-so-slight tendency to bash Sora. She's not a bad character; I just never really took to liking her in the show or outside the show so I'm sorry if you like her! Also includes more underage college drinking and mental confusion. You have been warned!

Thank you again to reviewers and Enjoy this chapter!

* * *

Chapter Two Matt's POV

I awoke in the middle of the night freezing. I sat up slowly and still felt as drunk as the moment I first sat on the bed. Memories flooded back to the front of my mind and I again was beside myself. I dared a glance over my shoulder. Taichi was laying there, a grin plastered on his face even through his sleep. I noticed that Sora was also still passed out next to him and remembered the encounter I had earlier with her as a shiver traced its way down my spine. Not knowing what else to do, I carefully crawled my way off the bed and to a spot on the floor. I immediately pulled my knees to my chest and attempted to gather some heat as my body visibly shook.

I also took this time to think about what happened; I was still so confused. I had kissed Tai, he had kissed me, and it just felt right. To be honest, I wanted desperately to do it again and whether or not that's the alcohol in me speaking, I don't care. Both Tai and I had enjoyed the kiss…but we were also both a little drunk…but he was also giving me those looks all night long, like when he looked jealous about how Sora decided to climb on top if me. Do I really like Tai? I mean, he's my best friend and he's a guy. I didn't really care about the fact that he was a guy because I have always supported gay marriage and I had had suspicions about myself and my sexuality…but I honestly never imagined falling for my best friend…or has this attraction always been there? Sighing to myself, I buried my head in my knees and closed my eyes; I needed help.

Suddenly, I felt a hand on my shoulder. I instantly raised my head from my knees and saw Tai crouching beside me. After blinking the dizziness away again, I realized that he was talking to me.

"Yama? Are you sick? What's wrong?"

"I just…I got cold. For some reason, I didn't know what to do." Taichi sighs in relief and smiles at this; he offers his hand for me to get up off the floor. Still feeling very disoriented, I reached for his hand and let him pull me to my feet with ease.

"You could've just told me, silly." Tai led me back to the bed and helped me lay back down before finding the blanket and draping it across our bodies. I glanced up at Tai as he settled back into the bed and couldn't stop the feeling of wanting to jump straight for his lips. Before I could move away, Tai had pulled me closer to him and wrapped a secure arm around me. I felt as his chest pressed against my back and warmth returned to my skin. Not bothering to ask questions, I simply let him spoon me and tried my best to fall back to sleep. Just as my breaths deepened and readied my body for sleep, I felt Tai lean close and plant a tiny kiss on the back of my neck sending those oh-so-delicious shivers down my spine.

I couldn't help myself; I sharply turned to him and pressed my lips to his passionately. I felt as he pressed harder against me and pulled me closer to him. I willingly obliged and raised a hand to his back gripping his shirt slightly. Before things could get too deep, Tai pulled away somewhat, catching his breath, and slowed down his kissing. He planted a few more tender kisses on my lips and pulled back to kiss my nose making me smile. Suddenly my eyes felt heavier and I couldn't put off being tired any longer. I released a yawn and leaned my head closer to Tai's chest. My eyelids drooped as I barely felt a kiss on my head and before I could stop it, I was back to the silence of sleep.

(-----------)

I awoke the next morning, sadly alone, to the sun shining in through the blinds onto the bed. Looking around for a few moments, I stretched my limbs and faintly heard the toilet flush in the bathroom. Seconds later, the sink turned on then off and Taichi came back to the room through the doorway. After pausing to yawn, he looked to me and immediately smiled warmly. I sat up a little, turned onto my side and leaned on my right elbow looking at him.

"Morning." He stretched for a moment before "accidentally" falling back into the bed with me. I raised my eyebrow at him as he moved his beaming smiling face to sit right below mine. He quickly leaned in and pecked me on the lips before I could say some smart-ass comment.

"How are you feeling this morning after your first night of drinking?"

"I'm feeling fine, no headache, and no more dizziness thank god." Tai chuckled at me and I made a face at him before, somewhat hesitantly, leaning down to kiss him again; his lips were just too damn tempting! Switching the topic, I spoke again.

"How's Sora doing?"

"She says she doesn't remember much but she's fine. She wants us to go to the diner for some breakfast soon."

"Well, if we're going somewhere then I guess that I'd better start fixing my hair." I moved to sit up but Tai suddenly wrapped an arm around me and dragged me down to lay next to him on the bed.

"Aw, but I like your sex-hair look." I rolled my eyes but couldn't help finding myself kissing Tai again. I mean, we're not drunk anymore and it's still happening…are we a couple now? I was so confused that I missed the fact that Tai had been talking to me.

"Yo, space cadet? You in there Matt?" I shook my head and focused back on Tai.

"Sorry, what did you say?"

"I said that no one is going to see you at the diner anyways so there's no need to fix your hair. It looks just fine."

"Yeah, right, because I can trust the opinion of a guy who has a mop on his head!" Tai's jaw fell open as I spoke.

"Hey! You take that back!" I smiled devilishly at him.

"What're you gonna do about it? Huh?" I should've shut my mouth. In an instant, Tai was straddling me and tickling me to no end. All I could do was laugh uncontrollably as he moved his fingers over my tender spots.

"Take it back or I'll just keep tickling!" Tai's smile grew as I tried to speak but could only laugh and try to keep breathing.

"Okay! I take it back!" I finally managed to get it out and Tai stopped his tickling, though he remained in his position on top of me. I had finally calmed down my laughing and I looked up at Tai; his eyes were sparkling.

"What?" I started to sit up when Tai leaned into my lips and we kissed once again. Everything began to tingle just like every time we kissed and the kiss grew deeper. Tai moved his hands to my cheeks and pulled my face closer to his as I moved my own hands to hang around his neck. We slowed down our kisses before eventually parting for breath. Tai smiled to me and tenderly kissed my nose again before, unfortunately, climbing off the bed.

"I guess you do need to fix your hair a little bit. Wouldn't want anyone to get suspicious." I smiled a little to myself but upon noticing Tai walking towards the door, I spoke.

"Tai?" He turned back to me and raised his eyebrows silently telling me to ask away. "Not that I'm not enjoying myself…but…what's going on here?"

Tai took a deep breath and his facial features grew pensive for a moment; at least I wasn't alone in not knowing exactly what was happening between us. Tai opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted as Sora flung open the door and stumbled in.

"Hey guys! Are you ready to go yet?" My eyes opened wide in shock when I saw Sora carrying a beer bottle with her; she really had become an alcoholic. "Tai you're driving right?" Tai turned to her and nodded to which she smiled big and took a swig of her beer.

"Matt's just gotta quick fix his hair and then we'll be ready to go, right Matt?" I just nodded to him and watched as he began ushering Sora out the door. He looked back briefly to me and I saw what almost looked like pain on his face. I sighed to myself as the door closed behind him and I rubbed my forehead for a moment. Not wanting to waste time, I moved from the bed to the bathroom and rubbed some water on my face before beginning to tackle the mess that was my hair.

A few minutes later, I had given up on making my hair look perfect and decided that I should get going so that Sora could get some food in her stomach to soak up all the alcohol. I looked myself over in the mirror once more and heard the question roll through my mind; what are you doing? I had thrown myself into so many new situations in just one night it was hard on my brain to process it all. Sighing for the millionth time, I ignored my wandering thoughts and turned around the leave the bathroom. Slowly, I made my way to the door and walked out finding Tai waiting for me. He looked up as I approached and gave me that 'are you okay' look to which I nodded and we both proceeded to his car where Sora was waiting and waving like an idiot at us to hurry.

(----------)

It turned out to be just the three of us going to the diner, which I was completely fine with; I really did not want to be surrounded by a bunch of hung-over strangers when I had a lot of thinking to do. Tai drove and I sat in the front seat with him while Sora thrashed around in the backseat. I still could not believe she was drinking this early but apparently, this is what always happens when they drink. Tai finally pulled up to the diner and we all got out and went to the front door. We had to wait for a table but it didn't take too long before we were seated. I sat in the other side of the booth across from Tai while Sora sat on the side next to him. We all began glancing over our menus in silence until the waiter approached.

"Good morning and welcome! How may I help you all today? Would you like to try a cup of our special morning blend of coffee?" I looked up at the woman and could immediately tell that she had had maybe one cup too many. Tai smiled at her and spoke timidly.

"No thank you, none for me."

"I would love some!" Sora's voice made me flinch; she was talking so loudly and probably unaware of it too. Tai shot her a look before turning back to the server, an uncomfortable smile on his face.

"Just that one cup please, ma'am." The woman raised an eyebrow at us, nodded and walked away mumbling something about stupid drunk college kids; it was true but still offensive.

"I have to go to the bathroom!" Sora announced to the restaurant and walked away in the wrong direction; suddenly my head had begun to hurt. I put my hand to my forehead and closed my eyes.

"You okay Matt? Is it hitting you now?"

"Nah…I think I just have a headache from Sora's yelling." Tai chuckled at my comment and then got serious.

"Matt…about your question before..." At this, I opened my eyes and looked across the table at Tai. He again had that pensive look on his face and I could almost see him trying to formulate his sentences in his head. I couldn't help but smile at the fact that Tai was actually putting a lot of thought into something; wait, does this mean that I like Tai? I'm still so confused. I notice that Tai is about to speak and I turn my attention back to him.

"Matt…I…" Then, of course, the waitress walks up with Sora following right behind her. After placing Sora's cup of the coffee down in front of her, the woman spoke.

"Have you all decided on what you want yet?"

"Oo, I know what I want. Your biggest stack of strawberry pancakes and some orange juice please!" The server wrote Sora's order diligently and looked to Tai for his order.

"Uh…I think I'm going to have your triple cheese omelet with a side of bacon and orange juice as well." She wrote some more down and turned to me.

"I'll just have a glass of water and a bagel with cream cheese please." She nodded to me and walked away leaving the three of us back to our awkward breakfast.

"Geez Matt, what're you a girl?" I rolled my eyes at Sora's comment.

"My stomach's not feeling great and I'd rather not risk throwing up; not all of us can just puke everywhere like you Sora." She stuck her tongue out at me and crossed her arms over her chest like a child. Tai tilted his head and looked over at me concerned.

"Are you sure Matt? I mean, we don't have to eat here if you don't feel well."

"No, no. I'm fine. Who knows, some food might be what I need in the first place." Tai nodded to me but I could tell, in his eyes, that he was still not convinced. Sora began talking, quite loudly again, about last night and the bits and pieces that she actually remembered but I just tuned her out; I had bigger fish to fry. The waitress showed up with our drinks and our food not too much later and we began to eat. For those first few moments, I had peace but that was once again interrupted by Sora.

"Wow! These pancakes are amazing!" I rolled my eyes at her as Tai tried to tell her to be quiet. I could see people staring at us out of the corner of my eye but I just continued munching on my bagel; my stomach was still not happy though.

The awkward conversation ensued but once we were finally all done, we left a tip for our server and got up to pay the bill at the register. I picked the receipt up off the table but Tai snatched it out of my hand before I even got the chance to glance it over.

"I got this one, don't worry about it."

"But Tai…" He smiles that smile at me again and my heart melts.

"I said I got it. Besides, I need to pay you back for stuff I'm sure. But you just need to do us both a favor and get Sora out to the car." I looked over to where Sora was standing and found her flirting with a big table of guys. Rolling my eyes, I made my way over there and began dragging her drunken ass away from them. Tai waved to me and told me that he'd just meet us out there so I continued dragging Sora until we were out of the diner. Sora unhooked her arm from mine and began walking on her own. I kept an eye on her to make sure she didn't fall and raised an eyebrow when I noticed the evil grin on her face.

"You know Matt, Tai deserves better than you." With that one sentence, I stopped dead in my tracks and looked at Sora's back in shock as she just continued swaying along. I began walking again to catch up with her trying to think of ways to act as if I didn't know what she was talking about but my actions spoke louder than my words could.

"But…how?" Sora scoffed at my half-sentence and turned to me. At this point, we had reached Tai's car and we stood at the back bumper face to face.

"Please, Matt. I may have been passed out for most of the night but I think that I know what I heard when I was awake." She paused to put her hand on her hip and look me up and down as if I was her inferior. "You two are disgusting but even if I approved of gays and lesbians, I would still think that Tai deserves a hell of a lot better than you as his boyfriend. Anyone would be able to see that by just looking at you. What are you even good for Matt? I couldn't tell you a single thing, that's all I know." Sora looked behind me and must've seen Tai coming because suddenly she called out that she wanted the front seat and ran to go and claim it; I couldn't move. It wasn't until Tai came up behind me and put his hand on my shoulder that I even remembered what was going on. Before Tai could speak, I simply walked to his backseat car door and got in.

The entire ride back to campus, Sora insisted on blasting the radio and singing along horribly to some American song by a band called The Click Five but all I could do was stare out the window my thoughts racing. On the occasion that I returned my focus to the people in the front seats, I always saw Tai's eyes looking back at me in the rear view mirror making my heart melt; but why, I still did not understand.

Tai decided to drop me off at my dorm first because I was feeling sick. At this point, I wanted to talk to Tai about this entire situation but at the same time, I really just did not even know what to say. Hearing Sora say those things about me was enough to send my mind into overload. So what if I did like Tai…how could he ever like me back? It must've all just been just drunken fluke, what was I thinking? He could never like me…right?

Tai pulled up in front of my dorm and put the car in park for a moment turning back to me.

"Do you need any help or anything? Are you going to be okay?" I nodded to him without making eye contact and moved my hand to open the car door. Making sure that I had the few things I had taken with me, I opened the door and got out of the car. I turned back to the two in the front seat and faked a smile.

"I'll be fine. Don't worry." I tried to look at Tai but my eyes couldn't go past the maniacal look on Sora's face as she stared me down. Tai was looking at me with those concerned eyes but finally he let me go.

"Alright then. I'll call you later on tonight, okay?" I nodded to him and waved as he and Sora drove off. Turning to my dorm, I slowly made my down the small set of stairs and into the front door. Once I reached my room door, I immediately noticed that it was locked so my roommate wasn't home. I reached into my pocket, got my keys, unlocked the door and within the instant I stepped in the doorway, tears were rolling down my cheeks. I turned back to close and lock the door before setting my keys down on my desk where I paused in my movements. As more tears flowed, I leaned on my arms against the desk; my keys underneath my hand were starting to dig into my skin but I couldn't move. I just stood and cried.

And suddenly I realized why my stomach had been hurting. All of the stress I had been holding in was now flowing out of my eyes and my stomach finally calmed but I did not feel any better overall. What was I going to do? On one hand, I had gotten drunk which dealt with a whole other issue within itself and on the other hand, I had made out with my best friend…several times…and enjoyed it. And it seemed as though he had enjoyed it too…right? Even though I had lived it, I was still trying to get all the facts straight. I took a deep breath and wiped tears from my cheeks before heavily sitting down in my wobbly desk chair. Sora's words danced through my mind teasingly, reminding me of a deeper inner battle that I constantly fought about with myself. Sighing again, I sat at my desk in silence, feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders.

End.

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Poor Matt! How is he going to deal with things now? Only I know I suppose.

PLEASE REVIEW! Again, your reviews are keeping this story alive. There's nothing better around to lift my spirits than a nice comforting review. I really do smile every time that I get a review and I've actually needed a lot of spirit lifting lately so please leave any sort of comment for me. :)

Thank you for reading! Hope to update soon for you guys but please know that I have finals coming up so I might not be able to work so much on my stories until mid-May.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon or any characters used in this story.

Author Note: Hey everyone! All right, now here's the next chapter of DC, and I know it's very short compared to the others but I felt bad for leaving the fic for so long, I just needed to post something. Please know that I am working on this like crazy and I have some good ideas heading your way. I just want to keep steadily posting so that I don't lose readers like I think I have on a few of my other stories.

This chapter may not be as long but it is a little dip into Tai's thoughts about the situation that he and Matt are currently occupying.

VERY IMPORTANT Warnings: Let me just first preface this chapter with the fact that it contains some MAJOR Sora Bashing. Moreover, I again repeat, Sora is not a bad character in the series but I for some reason just do not like her that much so, I apologize for my harshness against her in my stories but then again you have been warned. This chapter contains some _very harsh words against Sora_ so turn back if she's your favorite character. This chapter also contains some thoughts of Taito but no actual actions this time around. Also, some cursing.

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Chapter 3: Tai's POV

I furrowed my brow as Matt turned away from my car and headed towards the door to his dorm. I couldn't help but worry about him; ever since we had left the diner, he seemed quiet. Hell, ever since what happened last night he wasn't acting like himself. I couldn't blame him in the least though; I myself was still confused about it. I mean, I had made-out with my best friend several times and now all I could think about was pulling him into my arms and doing it again. Matt had asked me earlier what was going on but damn it all, Sora just had to walk up and interrupt; twice including at the diner! This was all so frustrating and to top it all off I could hear Sora's annoying voice in the back of my mind as I was trying to think. Then I realized that she was actually yelling at me.

"Earth to Tai! Matt's probably already to his room by now, do you think you could drive?" I looked over at her angrily and shook my head while putting the car back into drive and taking my foot off the brake. Sora mumbled a huffy thank you as I drove down the road and silence once again fell upon the car. It only took a few minutes to get over to Sora's dorm and I put the car into park again. Before Sora could reach for the door to get out, I spoke up.

"You know Sora, if you weren't part of the Digidestined and if you weren't a girl, I would not stop the urge I have right now to smack you across the face." Sora's jaw dropped and she looked like she was about to say something back, but I raised my finger to her and continued. "Not only did you prove that you're just a whore by, first, jumping on top of Matt last night and, second by agreeing to go home with some random guy who later just dumped your collapsed body into my arms; you also proved that you're an alcoholic by waking up this morning and getting drunk before even having breakfast. Do you even realize how loud you were talking in the diner this morning? The entire restaurant knew that you were drunk." Sora looked at me and I could tell that she was pissed at me. I was even surprised at myself for having said all that and I'll probably regret it later but it wasn't as if I was lying to her. This was something I had been holding in for quite a while and it was seeing Sora all over Matt last night that had finally sent me over the edge. Rolling her eyes, Sora just looked at me almost disgusted.

"Whatever Tai, I'm the embarrassment? Well, I'd rather go to a diner completely wasted then go off and have gay sex with my best friend." My eyes widened at this and anything I had left to say was lost. Sora smiled wickedly at me and spoke in a downright evil tone of voice. "That's right. I know what all happened last night with you and Matt." Sora paused and raised her eyebrows as though she'd just had an epiphany. "Oh, speaking of little Mattie, I guess maybe I should call him and tell him that I was wrong earlier."

I raised an eyebrow at her, "What are you talking about?"

Sora rolled her eyes at me as if I was stupid. "I basically told him that he was worthless scum and that you deserved better than him as your boyfriend but after this little outburst, I suppose you two are perfect for each other." I had lowered my head to try to tone out her condescending voice but what she had just said kept running through my mind until finally, I just couldn't take anymore.

"Get out of my car." My voice was barely above a whisper but I knew that she had heard me. Other than the low humming of the car engine, no other noises were around so she had to have heard me…but when she made no movements to open the door, I looked up at her glaring with all of my might. If looks could kill…

"Get the hell out of my car!" I saw as she jumped at the intensity of my voice before grabbing the door handle and pushing to open the door. Carefully getting out, she leaned down to look back at me; my glare grew as I saw the taunting smile that donned her face before she slammed my car door and walked away to her dorm door. Putting the car into drive, I immediately slammed my foot on the accelerator and decided that now was a good time to take a long thoughtful drive through town.

(-------------------------------------------)

As I pulled into a parking spot on campus, I found that even after my drive, my mind was still swirling with all my thoughts. While I was driving through town, my mind remained on what Sora had said to me about what she had told Matt. No wonder he had been so quiet after we left the diner. Of course, my mind had also dwelled on the previously mentioned blonde and our situation. I pulled the keys out of the ignition and grabbed some stuff out of the backseat; it was then that I actually looked out of my car window and noticed that it was already beginning to get dark outside.

"Have I really been out driving all day long?" I spoke aloud to myself and shook my head before gathering all my stuff and getting out of my car. I started the long walk back to my dorm, because unfortunately on-campus parking sucked so I still had a ten minute walk until I could finally collapse onto my own bed. As I walked, my mind focused back onto Matt and I remembered that I had told him that I would call so I immediately grabbed my cell phone from my pocket and dialed his number. Pressing the phone to my ear I listened as it rang and rang…and rang; no answer. Figuring that he might've fallen to sleep, I shrugged it off and continued the hike back to my dorm.

Finally reaching my dorm room, I quietly opened the door and closed it behind me looking in to find my room mate sitting at his computer with his headphones on. Looking over, he saw me and waved so I kindly smiled and waved back. That was about the only communication we ever shared to be honest. We both had separate groups of friends and most of the time at least one of us was always gone from the room unless we were sleeping. Setting my stuff down, I took a second to change into some sweatpants before plopping down into my wobbly computer chair. I stared at my laptop shortly before opening up my instant messenger program and immediately looking for Matt's name.

'IceBlueGuitar currently offline.' I cursed under my breath as I read those words. Matt really must've fallen to sleep. He did seem somewhat ill though…of course, who wouldn't be after the apparent encounter he had with Sora. My anger flared up again but, taking a deep breath, I calmed myself before I could go off the deep end. Instead, I just continued to stare blankly at Matt's screen name; I always found it to be very fitting of him. Obviously, the guitar represents Matt as a singer and blue is Matt's favorite color despite the fact that he wears so much black but most people just assume that the ice part is describing the blue part. I knew better though. I know that when Matt gets angry or emotional, that he surrounds himself with a wall and I can almost see how his eyes frost over when it happens and that's why he has ice as a part of his screen name.

However, I hadn't seen _anything_ in Matt's eyes earlier today. My mind drifted again and I sighed as my thoughts raced back to the few moments Matt and I had shared today leading up to his question of me.

"_Not that I'm not enjoying myself…but…what's going on here?" _He had asked me earlier but I couldn't answer him; in fact, this seems to be the one question that is so important but has yet to be answered at all.

I blinked away from my thoughts as the lights in my room went out and looked back to my room mate to find that he was going to sleep. For a second I couldn't help but think that his actions were somewhat rude but considering our lack of communication what was I to expect really? So, closing my laptop, I trudged over to my closet, stripped down to my boxers and climbed into my own bed returning to my thoughts for entertainment.

What would I say to answer Matt's question? I put my hands behind my head thoughtfully as I tried to formulate my words. Did I want to date Matt? To be honest, I hadn't ever really thought about it until last night staring into his deep blue eyes. I mean, of course I had noticed Matt's body before then because everyone just tends to check everyone else out just as a comparison to themselves, right? It was never sexual if I looked him over…though I don't think I could say the same thing now. Being so close to him last night…tasting his lips for the first time… nope, I can't even lie to myself anymore…I always try to play it off in my head that there's nothing there more than friendship, but I can't anymore. I've had very subtle feelings for Matt for a while now but I of course never acted on them. How could I? I had no idea if Matt had feelings for me and I was not about to risk everything to find out. So I just went on as if nothing had changed and relished in every minute I had with him. But last night…we just kept moving so close to each other…and I just needed to test things…see if he felt the same way…I had to try. I rubbed my eyes in frustration as I came to the conclusion I had known from the beginning; I wanted to date Yamato Ishida, my best guy friend. Now I just have to find out if Matt kissed me back because he was drunk and lonely or because he's just as confused about his feelings as I was once.

This was probably going to be the toughest thing I've experienced in my entire young life.

Flopping onto my belly, I buried my face into my pillow and decided that I would invite Matt to breakfast and talk to him then. Content with my decision, I allowed myself the peace of some sleep.

(----------------------------)

The next morning I awoke to an empty room…and an upside-down one. For some reason, my head was resting on my floor, my back was lying on top of my left arm which I couldn't currently feel and my legs were tightly wound within my bed sheets that were still tucked away into my mattress. I cursed aloud at realizing that I had fallen out of my bed in the night and slowly moved to stand. After getting at least a tingling feeling back into my arm, I untied my legs from my sheets and threw them half-heartedly back onto my bed before standing and cursing aloud again. My bones ached severely…this had to have been the fiftieth time this had happened and how I never woke up when it happened, I will never know. Rubbing my neck and yawning, I sat down at my laptop and opened it up. Checking the time, I saw it was still only 9:30 and I only hoped that Matt was awake this early so that I could ask him to meet me for breakfast. I opened my instant messenger and signed in.

"Come on, come on, come on… 'IceBlueGuitar is currently online,' awesome…but why the hell is he up so early?" I shrugged to myself and double-clicked on Matt's name.

End

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What's going to happen? Will Matt answer Tai's IM? Will they go to breakfast? What a cliffhanger!

Again, I apologize so much for the shortness but I hope that the chapter was at least decent! I hope to start writing and have the next chapter posted ASAP!

Thank you for reading and please review!

Also on a less related note, if you want more Digimon goodness, go check out my newer Digimon fic called "Everyone Has A Poker Face" It doesn't seem very popular but it's actually one of my favorite stories that I'm writing right now so if you have the time/want to, go check it out.

Thanks again!


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon or the characters I am now borrowing for my own sick twisted pleasure.

Author Note: Well, here is the next chapter for DC! Again, it could be longer but the way I figure it, you can either have shorter chapters but quicker updates or longer chapters and less readers.

Warning: In general, Matt's father is a nice guy, but in my story he's not so be forewarned that he is a mean man and overall a monster from my point of view. Again, I apologize for my whole situation with Sora but trust me when I say that I have known people to be just like Sora is in the series throughout high school but then go to college and turn into the person that I have made Sora out as here. Also within this chapter is suggestion of Taito.

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Chapter Four – Matt's POV

I opened my eyes slowly as I felt the sun warming my cheeks. I sighed; I suppose I had finally fallen to sleep but, looking to the clock in my wall, I saw that it had only been for three and a half hours. Still, after being up all night long, a nap was at least seemingly a little progress. I sat up in my bed taking a moment to stretch my limbs and noticed that I still hadn't changed out of the clothes I had worn to that damn party. I sighed heavily and leaned up against the wall next to my bed closing my eyes. After not eating, not sleeping and really not doing anything but think and cry silently all night long, I was still no closer to any major conclusion about Tai and me other than the fact that we still needed desperately to talk things out.

What does he think of me I wonder? Does he think less or more of me? I secretly hoped for more…because that's how I felt for him now. Before Friday night, I hadn't ever really thought of Tai and I ever being so close but now I couldn't get that tingly feeling out of my senses. I mean, ever since the Digiworld, we've always been close friends and I've always felt more comfortable around him compared to anyone else. And now? When this stress all started, I had no idea what I wanted and was just too damn confused and drunk to figure out any of it. I knew that I was comfortable being so close to Tai but I had no idea if it was actually him or just the comfort in general. I guess I was still not completely sure merely because I needed to see Tai again…but the one thing I do know now is that I want more, I admit it. Looking up into his sparkling eyes yesterday morning…I want to think that he feels the same way…but if anything, in this life I have learned to assume absolutely nothing when you cannot be one hundred percent sure of it. And, especially in this case, I was not about to assume something so huge and have it blow up in my face. I sighed again and looked across the room to my roommate's bed; neatly made everything in place. It was Sunday so he must've left early to go home and go to his church.

Feeling the need to move again, I shifted and slid across and off my bed. I flinched in pain for a moment and looked down at my hand noticing the spot where my key had cut into my skin. Making a mental note to look at that again later, I sat down again in my wobbly chair and opened my laptop. Without even paying attention, my mouse glided over my instant messenger and checked to see if Tai was online even though I knew he wouldn't be; it was 7:30 in the morning so why would he be. Still, my eyes lingered on his screen name.

'Ayimak' is currently offline; I smiled at Tai's name. I always thought that he was clever to think of it but he would shrug it off, of course. Everyone was always asking him what it meant or what it represented…not many people noticed that it was just his last name only backwards. But, knowing Tai, he would always think of some quick-witted elaborate story behind it so that people could 'ooo' and 'ahh' over it. I have to admit, while Tai wasn't exactly the brains of the group, he was pretty quick on his feet.

Opening up one of my frequented web-pages and letting my eyes dance over it without really concentrating on what they read, I shook my head to clear it and tried to think of other things. Unfortunately, other things on my mind included people I'd rather not think about either, like Sora or my father. They had both told me the same thing…that I was worthless...and deep down, I knew that I wasn't worthless but if people kept telling me so, I might start believing them. I mean, I wish that I could help it but, when people lose confidence or respect for me I can't stop the feeling that maybe they are right and before I know it, I've lost that confidence in myself…and I hated that. I hate that power that people have over me and despite how I try to say that I didn't care what people thought, that always got to me the most…especially when it came to my father. He knew this about me and he twisted it to his advantage on countless occasions, sometimes to guilt me into doing something but mostly because he just wanted to watch me squirm.

This was the truth about my father that not even Tai knew. Like I've said, Tai knew that my father would sometimes drink excessively, but I could never bring myself to tell Tai that when he did, he would emotionally tear me down and sometimes beat the hell out of me. It started happening every night, the drinking at least…my father would drink himself away and then sit on the couch rambling on until I came over to take him to his room. I got so used to taking care of my father that I didn't even notice or listen to what he was saying even when it was about me. A few things that he said would always stick out in my mind but I learned to just swallow it all down. When he realized one night that I wasn't listening to him, he punched me. The first time it happened, he apologized profusely but I didn't really believe him and then when it happened again, I was glad that I hadn't. He never touched my face despite how much he wanted to but he knew that I had to go to school with plenty of people who would notice so he, somewhat, bottled his rage. I wonder what my father would say now knowing that I had gotten drunk. I laughed to myself bitterly; it would probably be the first time he'd ever say 'good job' to me but I would never tell him that; I wouldn't give him the satisfaction. He had driven me away just like he had driven TK and my mom away. Now that I was in college, I never had to go home and I didn't plan to go anytime soon.

I sighed heavily to myself; how did I even get on these horrible thoughts? Though my mind has a great tendency to wander, I usually never allowed it to think on such things. I shook my head again and glanced back at the web page I had absent-mindedly opened…that is, until I noticed the flashing instant message on my screen.

'Ayimak is requesting to chat with you.' I glanced at my clock and wondered where the past two hours had gone before accepting the chat with Tai.

Ayimak: Hey Yama. Good morning.

IceBlueGuitar: hey Tai.

Ayimak: What are you doing up so early? I thought you slept in on Sundays.

IceBlueGuitar: I didn't sleep very well so I just decided to wake up and surf the web.

It wasn't a complete lie, but what was I supposed to say? I stayed up all night thinking about you?

Ayimak: oh okay…well, I was just wondering if you wanted to go to breakfast with me. I mean…maybe we could talk. You know?

I couldn't help but smile at Tai's bashfulness. Even over the computer, I could tell when he was not comfortable with something.

IceBlueGuitar: yeah, sure…er, I definitely need to shower first but we can meet.

Ayimak: Awesome! Yeah, I need a shower too. Umm…let's meet at the caf in…um…in a half hour?

IceBlueGuitar: Okay. I might be late depending on if my hair works with me today but I'll be there.

Ayimak: okay sounds good then.

Ayimak: and don't worry, your hair _always_ works for you. ;-)

_Ayimak is now away: "Towel snapping the locker room just never gets old. And it's twice as funny when your victim doesn't know you. Off to the showers!"_

I shook my head, knowing for a fact that Tai's away message was definitely something he believed whole-heartedly. Getting up, I grabbed my shower stuff and my towel and, closing and locking my door behind me, headed down the hall to the showers. Even as I showered, I couldn't keep the smile off my face due to Tai's comment about my hair.

(------------------------)

I made my way to the campus cafeteria glancing down at my watch and quickening in my pace. Of course, my hair had taken a little bit longer to fix up but I had given Tai fair warning. After finally reaching the doors to the building, I immediately headed straight for the staircase and bounded up them two at a time. I glanced up and found Tai's face smiling down at me and inflicting the same expression on my own face. I turned and walked around the staircase finally reaching his side. Standing probably a little too close to him, I lifted my head and spoke.

"Hey. Sorry I'm late…my hair." Tai rolled his eyes but his smile remained.

"Yama, how many times must I insist that your hair is and always will be absolutely perfect? Whether you style it or not, it'll always look good to me." I blinked somewhat at his very explicit compliment of me before rolling my eyes right back at him.

"And how many times must I remind you that I can't really trust someone with a mop for a head of hair." Tai pouted and I had a deja-vu moment of the previous morning…only sadly this time around we wouldn't be kissing. Probably noticing my not-so-happy face, Tai wrapped his arms around my shoulders and began to lead me towards the entrance to the cafeteria.

"Come on, I'm starving." I smiled to him resisting the urge to poke fun at him some more. As I followed my crazy starving friend into the caf, I realized that despite our silliness, this was going to turn serious quickly so, as I gathered what good food I could find, I began mentally prepping my words and myself up until Tai was talking to me again.

"Yo, buddy, where should we sit?" I looked around for a moment before finding a more secluded corner in the back of the seating area. Even though not many people were here to begin with, I usually liked to sit farther away anyway. Just as I was about to tell Tai my preference, I realized that he had already spotted where I had been looking and was heading there without me. I rolled my eyes again but couldn't help smiling as well; Tai knew me that well and for once, it was good to have someone like that. I walked after him and watched as he plopped down into his seat immediately digging into his massive pile of food. Sitting across from him, I sat down as well (of course, with a little more grace) and began picking at my food. I was always a little wary about the food from the caf ever since a kid in my class got food poisoning but in the end I didn't have much of choice beyond it so I dealt. I looked to Tai and found him staring at me. He instantly blushed and looked away but I just smiled at him.

"Yama…" He said it quietly but I had heard it clear as day and I looked to him almost feeling desperate just for him to speak again. I calmed myself as he returned my gaze.

"Yama…I've been thinking a lot. And…well…" Tai stammered over his words, but I was patient. "Well, firstly, no matter what happens you shouldn't believe a word that Sora said to you."

I grimaced at this and he noticed. "Yeah, she told me everything after I dropped you off and after I pretty much called her an alcoholic whore and told her to get out of my car." I raised an eyebrow at this.

"You did what? And you couldn't have waited for me to see it?" Temporarily, the sting of Sora's words went away as I pictured the scene Tai described to me playing out like a movie. I couldn't help but smile as he explained it.

"I was just furious…and before I knew it, the words were flying out of my mouth and then she told me the horrible things she said to you…and that was it. I mean, don't get me wrong, I feel bad for exploding at her but that smug smile she gave me as she got out tells me that she doesn't really care what I think." I nodded to him knowing the smile pretty well myself but soon the air around us became tense again.

"But anyway…that's not what we really came here to talk about now is it?" Tai stared at me intensely making me squirm somewhat.

"Like I said, I've been doing a lot of thinking. And I have to confess that what happened on Friday night was--."

"Hey guys!" I closed my eyes in frustration before opening them again and looking over finding Joe and Izzy walking over to us with their own trays of food. I heard Tai groan softly in utter frustration and I was tempted to do the same.

"Hey. How have you two been?" I watched as they sat down, Izzy next to Tai and Joe next to me, and waited for their responses to Tai's question.

"We've been doing well. We've actually been studying all weekend for a big physics test we have on Monday. What have you two been up to?" I remained completely silent as Tai laid out the basics of our weekend, leaving out the very specific details of course. After about ten minutes of aimless talking, it was obvious that Izzy and Joe weren't planning to leave anytime soon and without intending on it, I could feel as my frustration grew. All I could do to keep myself from yelling was to idly mix together the contents on my plate and not look up or speak. Even though they didn't know they had been intruding on something important, it just frustrated me because this was time Tai and I needed to talk about all the shit going on between us. Ever since Friday night this had been boiling inside of me leading up to this point and we just could not seem to time it right. Grinding my teeth angrily, I continued to pretend I was listening until finally something in me just snapped. Apologizing unenthusiastically, I stood from my chair, grabbed and discarded my tray before walking away and out of the caf.

I knew that I was being dramatic about it and that my life didn't depend upon that one moment that could've happened anywhere but it was just a matter of principle. This breakfast was extremely important to me and for it to be taken away within minutes of it even beginning; it frustrated the hell out of me. My thoughts were racing as I continued to storm down the stairs and out of the building before being stopped by a voice behind me.

"Matt! Would you hold on for a flippin' minute?" Audibly sighing in utter aggravation, I stopped walking and turned on Tai irritably.

"Tai, I just, I don't think now is a good time. I'm just…"

"But Matt, just please…" I shook my head at him and cut it off.

"Tai, you know, I just…it keeps happening like this!" I could feel my body shaking with the frustration I was holding.

"What do you mean?" Tai spoke softer that time as he stepped closer to me. Normally that would be something to calm me down but right now, I was too far gone on the angry train.

"I mean, that every time we try and talk about it, it never seems to happen. And it's not that we're just interrupted, it always happens that within seconds, things will be resolved but something happens. Someone walks up or wakes up from a drunken state, I just can't handle…I…maybe it just wasn't meant to be Tai." My mind was screaming at me as Tai's lips formed into a pout; what the hell was I saying and what would ever possess me to say it? I admit it was mostly the truth in what I was feeling but there was no need to bring it up when it was neither of our faults. Damn anger. I wanted to take it back but now it had already been put out there. I just stood there agape watching as Tai took in what I had just said. He wouldn't face me and I saw why as a single tear streamed down his cheek.

"Oh…well…I'll see you later Matt."

And before I could even try to stop him, Tai took off running toward his dorm. Cursing repeatedly under my breath, I didn't know what to do with myself but stand there staring after him. I had just ruined everything in three angry sentences. Eventually finding people staring at my non-responsiveness, I returned to my own dorm room finding that my room mate was still not back from going home for church; although, right now that was a good thing. Sighing and climbing back into my bed, my mind was too clouded to think about anything and before I knew it, I had fallen into the deep torturous sleep that I had longed for last night but dreaded now.

End

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Oh boy, what have I done now? Please don't hate me too badly…yet at least because it might get worse. Just a warning.

Please review! I always love them reviews, good or bad. Plus then I get to check out your stories too!

Thanks for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I do not own Matt, Tai or the Digimon series. I only dream about owning it.

Author Note: Here's the next chapter for DC. It's more angsty and pensive than the other chapters and for some reason it was hard for me to write. But my lack of updating is telling me that I should post this anyway so I don't lose any readers. It might not be the greatest chapter but it's something and I think it gets the point across. The next one will solidify this one even more though so I'm not so worried about it.

But enough of my ranting. Enjoy the chapter!

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Chapter 5 – Matt's POV

The next day, which of course had to be a rainy Monday, Tai and I didn't speak to each other at all. First he didn't show up to the psychology class we had both signed up to take which also meant we didn't walk together afterwards; in fact, I didn't see Tai at all until I went to the caf for lunch…but even then, I couldn't will myself to sit next to him. Walking in with my lunch tray, I stared at the spot where we always sat finding Tai, Joe and Izzy chatting away. People passed me by as I just stood and stared confused at what to do. I ended up just throwing my food away and going back to my dorm; I couldn't even look at him for long before feeling that I had made a terrible mistake.

I sighed to myself as I did several times a day now; how could I _not_ miss Tai? He was probably the only person who could and would brighten my day if he saw that I was upset and he always knew when and how to do it too. I couldn't help but feel lost without him but he; on the other hand, either was hiding things really well or honestly did not seem to care that we weren't talking at all.

I spent the coming weeks convincing myself that Tai was better off without me and unconsciously began to avoid going any place where I might see him. Beyond going to class and leaving for the occasional meal, I remained in my dorm at all times. I didn't talk to him online, I barely talked to any of our friends about it and anytime I even started thinking about Tai, I pulled out my school work and did that instead…but nothing was working. I physically could not stop thinking about Tai, I couldn't stop feeling bad about Tai and no matter how much I focused on my work, my grades were slipping further and further. I didn't understand it at all.

Feeling myself grow more frustrated by the minute, I slammed my pencil down on my desk and sighed heavily. It had been almost three weeks since any of this had begun, why would nothing work? Abandoning my statistics homework for the moment, for the first time I allowed my mind to wander and think about everything I'd been avoiding.

Why did I reject Tai in the first place? Why could I only think about Tai? Why couldn't I completely realize that Tai was better off without me? _Why can't I live without Tai?_ Before I even met Tai, I faced so many other worse things and it made me stronger to think that I could survive on my own. So why now could I not survive on my own?

And suddenly sitting at my desk trying to work on my stat homework; it hit me all at once. Before I met Tai, my parents divorced and my brother was taken from me. I was forced to live in a place where I had always been told that I was worthless and where I was beaten and abused…but Tai, even not knowing everything about me, accepted me into his heart and gave my life value and purpose other than merely surviving. No one in my life had ever purposely shown affection to me like Tai always had and it baffles me even now that someone could even do such a thing.

Before I met Tai, I felt invisible…but Tai made me feel _real_ for the first time in my life.

I couldn't believe it had taken me this long to figure it out that instead of pushing Tai away to protect him I should've started protecting him myself like he had always done for me... I realized now that I wanted Tai to kiss and hold me; that I wanted for once in my life to be loved.

But was he willing to love me now? It had been so long since I had even seen Tai since I made the biggest mistake ever. The one thing that I had realized from my blunder though was that Tai, in fact, does – or at least did, like me. Immediately forgetting my stat work, I knew that I had to find out where Tai was now and talk to him. I grabbed my cell phone from my pocket and hit Tai's speed dial number, pressing the phone to my ear and tapping my fingers against my desk impatiently. After three rings, I became impatient and slammed the lid before opening it again and dialing Izzy.

"Hello?" I praised the heavens at hearing Izzy's oddly still high-pitched voice.

"Izzy! Hey, it's Matt. Sorry to call kind of late but it's urgent."

"Matt? So you are alive…"

"What?"

"Nothing, I just haven't seen you in weeks…so what's going on?" I furrowed my brow and made a mental note to apologize to everyone about that, for now though, I had more important things to deal with.

"I just, I need to find Tai. You wouldn't happen to know where he is, do you?" I crossed my fingers.

"Let me think…uh, I'm pretty sure that he mentioned going to some big party on Market Street tonight to get completely wasted. Why do you need to find him? Is something wrong?"

"I'll have to tell you later Iz, I've got to go. Thanks, bye!" I, again, made a mental note to apologize for being so rude to him but hopefully if things went well Tai and I could explain what exactly was going on to him. I grabbed my keys, coat and shoes before heading out of my dorm and towards Market Street. I must admit that I was a little worried for Tai's intentions of being wasted not only for his sake but also for my own. Plus, he might not even remember anything after I say it tonight but I guess that I could only hope for the best.

As I approached the end of Market Street, I could immediately see which house was having the party from all of the people standing outside as well as the amount of noise coming from that direction. My heart was pumping faster as I grew closer and closer and I could almost feel the words I had planned to say flying out of my head but I knew that I had to get this over with before I exploded. So I walked and walked until I was finally standing on the outside of the big crowd looking into it and searching for Taichi.

My eyes fell upon him sooner than I had expected and I looked to him hoping that he would turn and see me. He was currently standing with a solo cup in his hands talking to some guy enthusiastically. For a moment, I thought that Tai was flirting but upon getting a better look at the guy, I noticed that he was one of Tai's old soccer buddies. I didn't have time to recognize which one though because I then looked back to Tai finding him staring over at me. I watched his expression change from one of hope, to anger and finally rested on confusion. He excused himself from the conversation and began walking towards me. I took a deep breath and released it shakily watching as Tai stumbled his way over to me. He finally stopped in front of me.

"What are you doing here?" It wasn't exactly the loving tone I had imagined him using but I guess it wasn't really angry either so I settled with it.

"I…We…" I glared at my own stuttering words before looking Tai dead in the eyes. "Tai, we need to talk." I surprised myself with my solid bravery but didn't get to enjoy it long as Tai spoke again.

"Well, I thought you had said your peace already but go ahead and talk some more if you'd like." He took another sip from his solo cup and I frowned. He was obviously drunk and I especially knew what happened when bad feelings mixed with alcohol. I looked around at the crowd hesitantly before looking back to Tai.

"Tai, do we have to do this here? Maybe we could go somewhere else to talk." He raised his eyebrow at me quizzically and I shifted uncomfortably.

"Why?"

"Well…you know I'm not good with crowds and I just…this is something between you and I." As I spoke the words, Tai just shrugged at me; he was toying with me and I did not like it at all. He knew damn well what I needed to talk with him about and yet he was acting in this way…

"What's wrong with right here? I think it's a nice front yard and quite popular…"

"Tai! Please…" I suddenly just felt really emotional. Not only was this bringing back memories but it was screwing with my heart. I felt the tears in my eyes and I knew he had seen them too; he blinked a few times and I saw the concern in those chocolate eyes. Thinking quickly, Tai ushered me off to the side of the house where there were only a few people standing toward the backyard. He sighed heavily and looked even more annoyed.

"Matt…what do you want? You already told me that you just wanted to be fr- ."

"But I don't!" He blinked at me suddenly and looked confused.

"You already said it Matt, you can't take it back now."

"Then I won't take it back. But I'm telling you now Tai that I can't stand a life without you…I don't know if you want me anymore but I can't stand it if we're not even friends." Shaking his head, he turned away from me for a moment. I was about to turn and leave when Tai turned back to me, swaying a little as he did.

"You don't get it, do you?" I stared at him feeling hurt by his words but it didn't stop there. "Matt, I waited _weeks_ for you to come to your senses! At first, I thought that maybe you just needed time. To be honest, all of it was new to me too but I thought, considering the way you reacted to my actions, I thought that we could do it together and it would just start to feel easy!" I winced at his yelling but frowned even more as his words grew softer. "You hurt me Matt. I just can't wait for you anymore."

"But Tai, if you felt that way about it, why didn't you come to me? You've always liked to bring me to my senses before this." I tried my chances with a bit of humor but it didn't seem to work. In fact, it backfired as Tai turned to me angrily.

"Oh I see now. So it's my fault that you rejected me and now you want me again? It's my fault because I didn't come after you?" To be honest, I was taken aback by this. Had I even uttered anything of the sort to him? I didn't think so but, again, things were far from over.

"But of course nothing is **ever** your fault is it Yama because you're perfect and everyone thinks you're so cool and loves you all the time." At this comment though, my anger flared.

"What are you even talking about Tai? When did I ever say that or give you that impression?" I watched as he downed the rest of his drink and rolled my eyes as he threw his cup down on the ground. I sighed thinking that this conversation was going nowhere fast and decided that it was time to end it.

"Look, Tai, you're not even listening to me. Why don't we just talk tomorrow when you're not drunk off your ass." I forgot to hide the disgust in my voice without realizing the consequences that it had.

"Never could finish a fight…" I heard Tai mumble behind me and turned to ask what he had just said when suddenly his fist had collided with my cheek.

Unsuspecting, I flew backwards onto the ground wincing and closing my eyes in pain. I looked to Tai who was standing above me and tears formed in my eyes, not because of the pain mind you, but because of the look of satisfaction on Tai's face…and the person it couldn't help but remind me of. I raised a hand to my cheek touching in lightly and wincing again as I found blood staining my fingers. I looked up at Tai one last time. This time he was blinking and staring at me wildly as if he didn't realize what he had just done but at this point, none of it mattered to me anymore. I just had to get the hell away from here. Slowly, I got up from the ground and, without looking at Tai again, turned and began walking in the opposite direction. Tears streamed down my cheeks and made my cheek burn in pain but I didn't care in the least; I just kept walking especially as I heard footsteps behind me.

"Matt! Wait!" His voice was desperate and his steps were fast and uneven but I made no effort to let him catch up to me. Despite what I could've done, I knew he would've caught up to me anyhow so I just kept walking at the same pace until finally he grabbed my arm. I turned to face him, immediately jerking my arm from his grip and glaring at him through blurry eyes. I didn't bother holding my tears at bay waiting for him to say something; I admit I wanted him to feel guilty.

He just kept staring at me looking shocked and hurt and I saw tears welling up in his own eyes but I held no pity for him. He didn't even know half of what was going through my mind. My crush and best friend had just punched me, images of my father were screaming through my mind, old memories of beatings… all of the thoughts that came as a result returned to the forefront of my memory, and I felt myself falling apart all over again. Breaking the gaze, I looked to the ground next to him and seemingly reminded him that I was waiting for him to say something.

"Matt…god…Matt I'm so sor-." He stopped when I began staring at him again with a blank look on my face. I shook my head to stop him from speaking and smiled weakly, putting a hand to his shoulder and squeezing it.

"No Tai…don't be sorry." Tears were flowing freely down my face now and I paused to hold back a sob. I saw his tears too and couldn't look at him anymore. I spoke my next words barely above a whisper.

"Sora was right…you deserve better than me." I gave Tai's shoulder one last squeeze as I saw him frown deeply but before he could say anything; I had already begun walking away. He reached his arm out after me but I took off into a jog back toward my dorm.

End

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Well, it wasn't quite as long and I don't think it was quite as good as the other chapters but I swear that the next chapter is going to be long, better and way more exciting. 

Please review and thanks for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I do not own Tai, Matt, or any of the Digimon franchise.

Author Note: **Thank you so much to all of my reviewers! **You all are always gracious and patient with me and I greatly appreciate it. In return, here's chapter six! As promised, it is much longer than the previous and it is full of some intense action!

Warning: abuse, yaoi, cursing, bloodiness, angst. Enjoy!

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Chapter 6 – Tai's POV

I punched him…I can't believe that I punched him…

I gracelessly dropped everything in the doorway upon entering my room not caring if my roomie was sleeping. How could I care about anything now? I just sucker-punched the one person I cared so deeply about it killed me. What am I going to do? I sighed feeling extremely frustrated…the look on his face before he left…the sobs he was holding back.

"Dammit Matt…I know you care…why are we acting like this…" I whispered to myself angrily and felt tears filling my eyes again. I could still feel my buzz from the party but I just wished it would go away instead of constantly reminding me of what had just happened. I had gone to the party to forget about all this, which was not a good reason because I ended up getting more drunk than I should have. I just wanted to have a good time with friends without sulking all the time. When I saw Matt at the party, I felt my heart almost stop but I couldn't control my emotions…I was such a jerk. He was just trying to be honest, he was trying to apologize and even get into something with me. God, I don't even know what we would call ourselves but it was something! I winced as my head started hurting; at least I was losing my buzz but this would be one killer hangover.

Feeling suddenly exhausted, I decided that tomorrow would be any good a day to sulk about this more, and if I slept I might gain part of my brain cells back so I could think of some way to redeem myself. So, without even changing into my pajamas, I climbed into my bed and closed my eyes

The next morning, I woke up and immediately gagged; I smelled like beer and I mean_ smelled_. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to sleep in my party clothes…now I'll have to wash my sheets too. Before I did anything else, I stripped and went to the showers down the hall to wash up. I came back in my towel and sat down at my computer, thinking of course about what to say to Matt if he happened to be online. Pulling up my instant messenger, I glanced over my friends' list in desperation for Matt's name; I should've known though that he wouldn't be there. I sighed to myself before I saw an instant message pop up from Izzy.

Prodigious Kid-Inc: Hey Tai, did Matt find you last night? He called me asking where you were and it seemed urgent.

I felt tears form in my eyes and I slammed my fist down on my desk in frustration. Groaning audibly, I covered my face with my hands and got to thinking about what I could do to win Matt back.

* * *

Three days passed and I still hadn't been able to talk to Matt. He wasn't going to any of his classes, he wasn't coming to eat any meals and he wasn't answering my texts, calls, or instant messages. I stopped by his dorm once to try to coax him out of hiding but he wouldn't even speak to me through the door. I was starting to get frustrated but I wouldn't let it get to me; I cared too much about Matt to let that happen again and I wasn't going to let up this time until he and I had, well, kissed and made up. And I mean a lot of kissing. I missed the kissing the most.

However, I soon found that I had lost my chance.

After another week of Yama not going to his classes, Joe, who had gotten a job on campus with the Housing department, told me that Matt's housing had been cancelled. Shocked and upset, I ran to Matt's dorm to see for myself and it was true. All of Matt's stuff was gone; his roommate said that he just picked up and left for seemingly no reason…my heart sank.

As I grieved, time flew. Another month went by and my freshman year of college education began circling the toilet bowl of life. I went to my classes but I didn't pay attention, I went to dinner with my friends but I didn't talk to them and I took what notes I had out to study but I failed all of my tests. I couldn't stop blaming myself for Matt leaving but I also couldn't help but feel like that wasn't the reason he left. I knew that I had screwed up on so many different levels but I find it hard to believe that Matt would pick up and leave school because of it. Yes, he would definitely sulk and skip classes but out of all of us, Matt was the most excited to leave and come here, why would he want to go back now? My mind kept flip flopping on me until finally I went completely stir crazy. With no word to anyone, I grabbed my keys and walked to my car probably scaring the people I passed along the way with my look of determination. When I finally got to my car, I slammed the key into the ignition and was off with a flash; I had to see Matt and find out the answer to my question.

* * *

I pulled into the parking lot outside of Matt and his dad's apartment and felt my stomach trying to impress my kidneys with back flips. I took a deep breath as I stepped out of my car staring up the three stories to one of the apartment windows. I knew that it was now or never but considering how desperately I wanted it to be now, I found myself slowly climbing the stairs. One at a time, keep breathing, everything will be all right.

I stepped in front of Matt's front door and probably could've vomited on the spot but I decided on knocking instead, holding my breath while I waited. Five minutes passed and I still couldn't hear anything on the other side of the door so I knocked again, a little louder this time. Before long, I heard a raspy voice answer without opening the door.

"Who is it?" I could barely hear them or even tell who was speaking so I assumed it was Matt's dad.

"Um, Mr. Ishida?" There was a long pause and I just found myself staring at the door awkwardly. I was about to ask again who was speaking but I heard another small whisper.

"Tai…" I scrunched up my nose.

"Matt, is that you?" I pressed my ear to the door thinking that maybe it would help me recognize him; instead, I heard a small choked sob.

"Tai…you have to leave." His voice was closer now and I could definitely hear Matt's voice but why was it so raspy? I kept listening as I heard him sniffle. Immediately, tears were in my eyes; was I making my Yama so upset?

"Yama…please open the door."

"Tai, I can't. Don't ask me to do that. You can't…" His voice trailed off and I rubbed my eyes trying to remember the main reason why I came here. Taking a deep breath, I spoke again.

"Yama, you don't have to open the door I guess but please just answer one question for me." When I didn't hear any protesting, I continued. "I just…it's killing me inside thinking about it…I just…Matt, please just tell me that you didn't leave because of me and what happened. No matter what your answer, I'll leave you alone after that I just can't stand living thinking that I was the reason you left." I couldn't hold in the tears as I spoke. I put my hand on the doorway in a way to reach out to him through it and I got scared when I didn't hear anything. "Matt?"

"You weren't the reason I left. Far from it, Tai." His voice was distant but it didn't matter what it sounded like because I had finally heard it from his own lips. I put my hand over my eyes to hide my tears and I nodded even though he couldn't see me.

"Thank you Yama…I'll go now…" I began to walk away but stopped at hearing Matt's strained voice through the door again.

"Tai!" He hadn't really yelled it but I could tell that he said my name in desperation. I pressed my ear to the door again, as I heard him sobbing quietly and sliding against the door, I assumed until he reached the floor.

"Please don't go…" I was instantly alert again; his tone was downright frightened. I kneeled on the ground on my side of the door and listened to his soft crying. I leaned my forehead against the door painfully.

"Matt, please let me in. We both know that we need to talk."

"Tai…I can't open the door…please trust me, you don't want to see me or come in…I-I couldn't handle it." His voice was sounding better but his words still sounded painful; I couldn't stand hearing it anymore.

"Yama, I'm sorry." It was almost a whisper when I said it but upon hearing Matt sob harder, I knew he had heard. "I was completely idiotic and I just…I can't live like this without you in my life. I understand if you don't want me as your boyfriend anymore because I was a complete asshole to you and I deserve that much…but I need you." I closed my eyes tightly. "Matt, I love you."

I pulled my forehead away from the door and looked desperately at it trying to develop x-ray vision. I knew I had just put everything on the line with that one, but over my recent weeks of mental absence from the world, I realized that very fact. I realized that how every time I even thought about Matt, I worried about him and I just wanted him to be happy. It didn't matter now if Matt rejected me because as long as he was doing what's right for him, I could live through the pain. I couldn't hear anything on the other side of the door and I sighed. Feeling my knees scrape against the cement floor, I stood slowly and glanced longingly at the door one more time. I got about halfway into my turn away from it, when I heard the door creak open and felt Matt's lips collide with mine. It was probably the greatest feeling ever except that Matt was standing so far away from me. I could feel his lips trembling and the salty wetness from his tears; I wanted to pull him close to me and tell him that everything would be okay but the moment my hand even grasped his arm, he broke the kiss and pulled away, grunting in pain.

"Yama, are…" My voice trailed off as my eyes fell upon him. I could only stare at him with my mouth and eyes wide open; I was barely even breathing. He turned away from me trying to hide his appearance but I had already seen enough; the dried blood on his clothes and in his hair, his bruised and swollen discolored face, gashes on his arms and the way he couldn't seem to stand up straight. Tears of anger immediately flooded my eyes.

"Yama, what's happened? Who di-." Looking at me fearfully, he covered my mouth with his fingers and told me to hush. I glared at him forcefully but he only sighed and became pensive. Removing his fingers from my lips, he grabbed my hand and quickly ushered me into his apartment. My senses cringed at the smells; beer, old pizza and dirty socks. I kept my mouth shut as Matt tugged me quietly across the apartment and into his room but I can guarantee that the second his room door closed, I was speaking again in a hushed but forceful tone.

"Yama, what the hell has happened to you?"

"Tai please don't talk to me like that." He was breathing raggedly and using the wall as support but his tone reminded me of the old days. "I didn't bring you in here not to tell you, just please help me get to my bed." Having effectively shut me up, my anger was instantly softened; Matt had that affect on me really, and I was quickly by his side trying to help him across his room. We finally got to his bed and he sat down wincing in pain even at sitting on the soft material. I glared at him concerned.

"Before we get into now, can we rewind for a second?" Not knowing what else to do, I agreed with him. I knew that Matt wasn't and really couldn't avoid talking about his appearance and I knew that this first talk was very overdue.

"Tai…" He paused and I saw tears forming in his eyes before he looked straight at me. "Do you really love me?" I stared at him thoughtfully before smiling somewhat and nodding.

"I love you with all my heart Yama. I don't think I could breathe without you if I tried and I'm never going to let you go." Tears fell down his cheeks and I longed to swipe them away but I wouldn't dare touch his cheeks in fear they might break, that's how badly they were bruised. Tears fell from my own eyes and I pulled my eyes away from his. "Yama…I know that we need to have this talk but I just can't stand this any further. I just want to pull you into my arms but I can't…what's been going on?" I looked to him again with sorrowful eyes and I watched as he sighed.

"Tai, I've never told you or anyone about this…" He turned to look me in the eye and I swear I could see him slowly breaking. "I was really hoping I would never have to but things change I guess."

"Who's been doing this to you?"

"My dad." Matt seemed to almost chuckle the words out ironically. I looked back at him completely shocked. Thinking about it now, he almost seemed like an obvious choice because Matt didn't leave the house much but before I had honestly never thought it could've been Mr. Ishida.

"Oh Yama…but why? And how long?" Seeing that his hands were shaking, I carefully took them into my own. Beyond small cuts, his hands seemed to be the only relatively safe spot to touch.

"He…he beats me when he gets really drunk. I can't remember for how many years. He never used to do it this hard because I was going to school everyday and he didn't want to get in trouble…but now that I'm home all the time…" I winced at the thought of it all.

"Jesus Yama…Why did you leave school? Why would you come back to a home like this?"

"Well, I couldn't take it there anymore. My CRL came to my room and told me that either I had to consent to going to a therapist and continue with my classes or I would get kicked out. And when I said that I didn't want to see a therapist, they pretty much dragged me back to my home…and once I was here, there was no turning back."

"How could they just kick you out? That's horrible!"

"It's not like they asked me if it wasn't safe…"

"Yama you should've come to me. I could've helped somehow."

"Tai, I'll stop you right there. Don't blame yourself. I didn't even have time to do that before they had me on a bus back here."

"But why?"

"They called him." My eyes widened at this fact. "They called him and told him that I was skipping all of my classes." I felt Matt shudder. "He told them to get me back here as soon as possible. It was horrible Tai." Yama's voice had been distant and angry until now. Now it was trembling and he leaned against me gently. I wrapped one of my arms around him cautiously making sure I wasn't causing him pain before he continued.

"He beat me…He knew I was skipping classes so he hit me…" Matt stopped as a sob escaped his broken lips. "He said that I was a waste of his money and of his life and everyone's." My eyes watered more as Matt looked to me with those dead eyes. "He told me that everyone would be better off…but you love me, right?" Tears burst from my eyes and ignoring his own pain, Matt wrapped his thin arms around my waist and I returned the gesture gently.

"My god…Matt. No, he's not right. I would be lost without you, I would be dead inside." Matt sobbed into my shoulder and I sobbed right along with him. His voice became almost frantic now.

"Tai, I don't sleep, I can't eat; sometimes I can't even move." I pulled him away and held his cheeks in my hands, trying my best to wipe tears from them. "Food just doesn't taste good anymore…and if I ever do get an appetite, he won't let me eat. I wake up in the mornings and I can't do anything…I just lay there and wait until he finally drags me from my room. My body slams in the doorway…I think some of my ribs are broken…"

I stood from Matt's bed. "Matt, if that's true you need hospital attention now." I offered my hand to him but he just shook his head fearfully and his eyes widened tenfold.

"Tai, I can't. I can't leave, he'll know."

I was about to reply to him when we both heard a crash in the other room. I glared at the noise and was about to ignore it when my eyes opened wide in realization. I stared at Matt's pained expression and whispered.

"Shit, he's here!?" If I had known he was in here, I never would've let Matt lead me in here before. Matt stood quicker than he should have, putting his hand over my mouth. More tears formed in Matt's eyes as he looked at me.

"Yamato!" Mr. Ishida's voice bellowed through the apartment and I was about ready to charge through the door and pummel him. Matt's anxious eyes were the only thing to stop me.

"Tai…you have to hide. Just stay in here, please." He was pleading with me now but all I could do was shake my head at him angrily. His voice grew softer. "Tai, I couldn't bare it if something happened to you…please…just stay here." I was not about to stay put but I nodded to Yama to satisfy him. Slowly, he took as deep a breath as he could and he opened the door. I stared at his retreating back until the door had completely closed at which point, I had my ear pressed against the wall attempting to listen.

"Yamato, where the hell have you been?" Mr. Ishida was screaming at him, why exactly I wasn't quite sure but I kept listening.

"I'm sorry, sir, I just…" Yama had no time to explain; a loud smack echoed through the apartment followed by a thud, which I assumed, was my Yama falling to the floor. I clenched my fists angrily as I heard Matt cough.

"Why the hell isn't my apartment clean you little shit! You've had plenty of time and yet it's still full of trash including your sorry ass." I heard another thud and Yama cry out in pain, coughing more.

"Please, I'll have it clean soon, just please don't." At hearing Matt's severely uneven voice, I completely lost it. I reached my arm out to grab the door handle but not before pulling something out of my pocket, fidgeting with it and holding it behind my back. I threw the door open dramatically and glared at seeing Mr. Ishida towering over Matt who was currently cringing away from him on the floor. Yama looked back to me suddenly and I just looked at him concerned, trying to ask if he was okay. He got tears in his eyes and shook his head at me, obviously scared. I tried to reassure him, but I rolled my eyes at Mr. Ishida's voice.

"Taichi Kamiya. And what exactly would you be doing in my apartment? Hiding in my sons' room?" Mr. Ishida turned his glare from me back to Matt before reaching down and grabbing him roughly by his collar bone. Matt tried to hold in his shriek of pain as he was pulled back to his feet and I only glared at the man holding him.

"Mr. Ishida, put your son down. Matt doesn't deserve this, why are you doing it?" The man just smirked at me, not releasing Matt from his grip.

"Matt knows the rules. If he disobeys me then he gets punished." He finally released Matt, who immediately crumpled and fell against the couch barely managing to keep himself up. Mr. Ishida just kept his gaze on me. "And this is really none of your business Taichi. Why don't you run on home now so I don't have to hurt you too?" He began to walk towards me, causing Matt to protest.

"Dad, no. He hasn't done anything please just leave him alone! I'm the one you want!" Tears were rolling down Matt's cheeks and I knew that I had to be strong for him; I just hoped that my plan was actually working. I glared up at the man defiantly as he grew closer.

"Do you feel like a man when you beat him? Because you could never be one again! You've only got one son left to see, only one family member…it's no wonder your ex-wife took Takeru away from you. I see now that you could never be a good father, no matter how much you pretend around everyone." I spat out my words at him and watched, as his expression grew angrier. I have to admit, I gulped when he stopped directly in front of me and he smiled at that.

"You just dug your own grave." He reared back and punched my jaw so hard that I flew sideways. I knew he was going to hit me, but I hadn't quite expected that. I heard Matt cry out my name as I tumbled across the floor. Then, I heard something clank on the floor next to me and my eyes widened; well, my plan was foiled. I sat up and looked grimly as Mr. Ishida glared and picked up my cell phone, which I had been hiding behind my back. The man pressed the receiver to his ear and his glare deepened at what he heard.

"Kid, we're sending an emergency vehicle and a squad to your location right now. Just hang in there!" Mr. Ishida threw my phone down and I smirked at him not caring as my phone split in two. I could see Matt crawling towards us out of the corner of my eye and tried to tell him to stop moving. Unfortunately, just as I was about to open my mouth to speak, Mr. Ishida had shoved his foot into my stomach. I doubled over in pain, feeling dizzy for a moment before painfully looking up to the furious man.

"How dare you call the cops on me!" He was fuming. I personally found it kind of funny though I probably should've stopped myself from smirking and uttering my next words.

"Fuck you, Mr. Ishida."

I wasn't surprised to feel his foot in my stomach again and I closed my eyes in pain. He didn't give me much chance to recover though as he grabbed me by the collar of my shirt and began punching my face repeatedly. I just had to keep telling myself…this is for Matt. After a few more punches, I tasted blood in my mouth and felt like I was about to pass out if not for the fact that somehow the man had been pulled off me. I fell against the wall and tried desperately to stay awake.

"Tai, get out of here while you can!"

"Shut up you! Neither of you are going anywhere now!" I blinked several times at the sound of voices. When my eyes finally refocused, I looked over and did not like what I saw. Mr. Ishida was once again towering over Matt. Despite the fact that Yama was obviously scared to death, he glared up at his father as best as he could.

"It's too late now dad, the cops are on their way. It doesn't even matter anymore!" Matt stopped short as his father punched him and sent him sprawling to the floor. I flinched at hearing Matt cry out in pain but noticed as he still glared.

"You were wrong dad. Someone does love me and I won't let you tell me otherwise. You're not going to hurt me anymore!" Courageously, Matt flung his legs against Mr. Ishida's causing the man to tumble to the floor as well. Matt looked to me desperately, trying to drag himself toward me. Breathing heavily, I tried to smile at him and push myself away from the wall but my balance was gone and I fell back heavily. He frowned and tried to move faster but upon feeling a hand wrap around his ankle, he shut his eyes tightly. Mr. Ishida easily dragged his son back in his direction and started glancing between the two of us grinning sadistically.

"Oh, I see now. It's Tai that loves you, well isn't that sweet." The dark-haired man suddenly grabbed Matt's cheek, pulling their faces close together.

"If I had known about this sooner, I might've taken advantage of it…but now I think I'll just kill the last person who loves you." Mr. Ishida almost threw Yamato's cheek from his hand and began stalking back in my direction. I felt my heart rate speed up tremendously and I tried to move but found that I still couldn't. How Matt did this for so long, I will never understand. The man was almost at my side when he grimaced and cried out in pain. Turning on his heel, I watched as he glared and looked beyond him seeing Matt with an already broken beer bottle in his hand. Noticing the blood oozing from Mr. Ishida's leg, I realized that Matt had cut him with the bottle but his wound didn't stop the man from retaliating with a kick to Matt's chin.

Everything was happening so quickly…my vision blurred for a moment and all I could do was listen to various cries of pain from both contenders. I heard a loud thud suddenly followed by a sharp intake of breath. When my vision finally returned, I glared weakly at what I was seeing.

Pinning him on the ground with his body, Mr. Ishida had his hands wrapped around Matt's neck and Matt was frantically trying to pull his hands away from him. My senses immediately kicked in at the time limit that had been placed. Glancing around hysterically, I saw a knocked over wooden stool to my left and immediately willed myself to grab it.

Now might not be the greatest time but I have to say. I take back something I said before…I thought the toughest thing in my life would be winning Matt over but definitely, the true experience was fighting to get his father away from him right now.

Feeling the adrenaline kick in and standing as best as I was able, I held the stool high over my shoulders and brought it down on Mr. Ishida's head and back as hard as I could. I repeated my actions I think three times before I saw him collapse and fall over onto the floor next to Matt. Breathing heavily, I threw the stool away from me and dropped down to my knees where Matt was taking in deep, ragged breaths. I carefully leaned down and helped him sit up. The second Matt was in a sitting position; he was clinging to me and sobbing into my chest. Unable to do anything else for the moment, I simply held him in my arms trying to calm him.

"Yama…it's okay now, you're safe. We're both safe."

"Tai…" I looked down petting Matt's blonde hair soothingly and he looked in my eyes. "Thank you…and…I love you too…I realize I didn't say it before." He did his best to smile at me and I returned the gesture nodding knowingly and holding him closer to me.

I praised all that was good when I heard sirens outside and footsteps barreling up the staircase like a stampede. Moments later, the door was kicked in and a police officer was at my side. He was asking me a bunch of questions that I couldn't really hear or care to answer. Eventually, I looked him in the eye and he shut up.

"Arrest that guy and point me to the ambulance, my face is killing me." He nodded dumbfounded at my lethal tone and, focusing all of my remaining energy, I scooped Matt into my arms and slowly moved in the direction of the nurse that was just now bursting through the front doorway.

End

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So, I apologize for the really whacky lines in this chapter. I guess I was in a good mood when I was writing. Although, I could see and hear Tai saying all of those weird things. I just hope it didn't ruin the angst. Also, I'm sorry if the descriptions on the struggle were crappy. I really just don't think I do well with them. Other than that though, I hope that this chapter was enjoyable!

Please review and thank you for reading!

PS – I start school very soon now, and I am hoping to get the next chapter written and posted ASAP but I'm not exactly sure on when that'll happen. I apologize in advance for the delay but school comes first. (sadly)


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon. I'm just a major fan, please don't sue.

Author Note: Okay. I realize it's been quite a while since any updates have been made for this story but here's chapter seven! I apologize for the long wait and for the shortness of the chapter but I have so much else going on, I wanted to at least get something out…I just hope I haven't lost many readers…

**Thank you,** as always, to me previous reviewers and readers!!!!!!!! You guys are awesome! I don't know how I would write without all of you!

Warnings: Actually, I don't think that there are really any warnings for this chapter. OOC-ness. Obviously, still yaoi but other than that nothing really. Horrible writing maybe? I don't know.

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Chapter 7 Tai's POV

Idly running my fingers through my hair, I stared at the hospital tile beneath my feet. It still hadn't quite hit me yet what all had happened to me and especially Matt; everything flew out of hand once the police and medics arrived. After pointing the cop toward Matt's dad, I carried Matt as carefully as I could down to the ambulance. He was scared out of his mind and relieved but seemed otherwise fine, that is, until I reached the bottom of the stairs. All of the sudden, Matt leaned his head heavily against my shoulder and let out a deep breath of air. At first, I thought that it was just a sigh of relief but when I looked down to reassure him again, he was just staring off blankly. I jogged the rest of the way to the ambulance and once everyone was secure the vehicle was on its way; meanwhile, in the back the paramedics were bringing Matt back to life.

I was only in the actual hospital for about fifty minutes from the time that I followed Matt in to when they finished patching me up. Overall, I walked away with four fractured ribs and two broken, an extremely bruised cheekbone and one less tooth in the back of my mouth, which meant that I was too lucky for words. Matt on the other hand was still in surgery putting me in the waiting room for roughly two hours now. At this point though, I was pretty much numb in body and mind, so numb in fact that I barely reacted when my family first showed up. They all gathered around me worriedly; my mom knelt in front of me examining and staring. I flinched as she touched a finger to my cheek and spoke horrified.

"Taichi, my baby boy! What did that evil man do to you? Are you all right?"

"Mom, he's not all right, would you back away? Give him some space."

Kari tried to smile at me comfortingly as she held my hand in her own but I just stared back at her. When I finally pulled my gaze away, everything just hit me all at once. Within seconds, I hunched over as much as I was able in my seat with tears raining down my face, sobs escaping my throat, my shoulders shaking through the tears and the pain. Immediately I felt my family's warm embrace and sobbed even more, it was my turn to lean on someone else. After I felt like I'd had a sufficient "moment", I pulled away from my family and wiped away the tears. I sniffled quite a few times until I looked to my family again.

"Thanks for coming down here…"

"Oh Tai, of course we would come! I'm just sorry that we're so late; we were out to dinner and didn't hear your dad's cell phone ring. Now what has happened?" My mom looked up at me empathetically and I took a deep breath.

"It's kind of a long story…"

"Just tell us what we need to know and we can get details later, okay?" I nodded to her and watched as she, Kari and my dad all grabbed a chair in the waiting room and sat down. Quickly, I made the decision to leave out the fact that Matt and I are kind of dating and began the short version of the story.

"Well, back at the university, Matt and I got into a big fight and we both started doing poorly in school. Then, after we had another fight about it, Matt just stopped going to classes and talking to anyone for good until one day they kicked him out of school. Obviously, he had no other choice but to go home and his dad was extremely abusive." I paused for a second to let that all soak in before I moved on.

"Back at school though, it was driving me insane because I had no idea why Matt had left in the first place so today I decided to just drive up here and find out. At first, I didn't know that Mr. Ishida was home but Matt pulled me into his room and explained everything. Then we heard his dad wake up in the other room and he started hitting Matt; I couldn't just hide in his room and do nothing mom." I had to stop talking for a moment and I noticed myself trembling. My mom ran a soothing hand across my back and I finished.

"So I called the cops and went out there to try and protect him…I guess the rest is pretty self-explanatory. I haven't seen Matt at all yet though…not since they took into surgery." I looked around at my family's faces and noticed Kari crying. Immediately, I lifted my arm and put it around her shoulders.

"How long had that been going on?" My dad was obviously disappointed and angry about the situation. It was understandable though; there was a time when Yama and I would hang out all the time and our dads were friends. I merely shrugged at his question.

"Not sure exactly, but from what Matt said, I think years." At this my father stood, shaking his head in disgust. I was about to say something to him when my phone started ringing. Sighing a little, I looked down at the name and saw that it was Izzy calling me back. I had called him earlier to let him know what was going on.

"Hey Iz."

"Tai, hey, how're you doing?" Ah, the redundant question of the day.

"I'm going crazy but hanging in there. Where are you guys?"

"We're pulling into the hospital parking lot now."

"All right, I'll come down and get you."

"Okay, see you soon." I closed the phone, depositing it back into my pocket, but as I moved to get up my mom put a hand on my shoulder.

"You stay here Tai; we'll go get your friends for you. Your father needs some fresh calming air anyway." I looked up to her thankfully and nodded as they walked out the door. Once they had left, I returned to staring at the floor.

"How do you think Matt's doing?" Kari sniffled next to me after she spoke and I tightened my grip on her shoulder for her sake as well as my own; I could feel tears collecting behind my eyes again.

"He's still in surgery right now…I haven't heard anything for hours but I know he'll make it out of there."

"What about the others? Does anyone else know all the details yet?"

"I know that they called Matt's mom and obviously I've called Izzy; he and Joe are here now. As far as Sora and Mimi though, I'm not sure." Kari nodded but posed another question.

"And how are you doing? I mean, really, now that mom and dad aren't around?" I looked over to her woefully.

"I'm scared Kari…I don't want to lose him, especially right now." A few tears escaped and fell down my cheeks but I didn't bother with hiding them. Kari just looked at me knowingly before leaning in to give me another hug. I clung to her almost desperately and closed my eyes tightly as more tears threatened to fall. Kari just held me in return until the waiting room door opened again; I pulled away from my sister and saw Izzy and Joe walking my way. Once they were a bit closer, I stood and wrapped my arms around the both of them.

"I'm so glad you guys came." I pulled away and they looked to me worriedly obviously seeing that I had been crying.

"Of course we came. Sheesh you get a phone call like that and you drop everything and get in the car immediately. We weren't just not going to show up; you and Matt are our best friends." I inwardly smiled at Joe's rambling speech and nodded my thanks again before motioning for them to sit down next to Kari and I. Briefly, I wondered where my parents were gone to but deciding that I had more important things to think about, I focused on the people around me. Izzy spoke.

"I don't mean to sound redundant, but have you heard anything about him?"

"No, I've been here for a while now but still no word. I think they're still in surgery…I'm just so worried."

"We're all worried Tai and we're here for you as well as Matt."

"I know…thank you again." I smiled at my two friends but a question was nagging at the back of my mind. "Did you get a hold of Sora or Mimi?" At this, Joe stepped in.

"We talked to both of them. Mimi wanted to come today but she's out of town right now. She said that she would be on the next plane home, no questions asked. Sora on the other hand…" That was the point when Joe passed the task to Izzy.

"We got a hold of Sora actually right after we got off the phone with you. We told her and offered for her to ride with us but she just kind of shrugged it off. She said that you probably wouldn't want to see her." Izzy paused as I nodded in agreement; honestly, I didn't really want to see Sora but it wasn't so much so that I hadn't wanted her to come and visit if she wanted to. My actions spurred further questioning.

"Did something happen between you two?" I frowned at remembering that I hadn't actually told anyone about the things I said to Sora; I guess that I was too occupied with a certain blonde.

"It was quite a long time ago…we had a fight."

"What happened?" Kari spoke that time, reminding us of her presence.

"She said some really nasty things to Matt and upset him. Then she flaunted what she said and I got angry and had a few choice words with her." I paused, thinking back to that day. "Honestly, I do regret that fight and what I said to her but at the time it was an especially sore subject."

"I get the feeling though that this subject is not something you want to talk about?" I glanced over at Joe and sighed some; I had been debating on whether or not to tell everyone about Matt and me now or later.

"Eventually, I'll have quite the story to tell you guys…just not now." I had resolved myself to waiting for Matt to tell anyone about us. Besides, I didn't even know what the situation would be once this all finally ended. I was glad to see everyone nodding to my request and gave another thankful smile. I looked up once more upon hearing the waiting room door swing open again; I stood when I saw that it was a doctor walking into the room.

"Are you all here for Ishida Yamato?" I eagerly nodded, words escaping me for the moment. I found myself blindly reaching for Kari until finally she put her hand in mine and allowed me to squeeze it. The doctor looked up from her charts again.

"Has his mother or any family member arrived yet?" The woman was really trying my patience and sanity.

"No, but I'm the one who came here with him. I was also involved in everything." I restrained myself from screaming, 'don't you see the bandages?' and continued to stare at her keenly. She seemed to have a look of indecision on her face but finally she nodded to me.

"Overall, your friend is extremely lucky. We had to resuscitate him several times because of the brutality of his wounds and obviously it took quite a while to even patch him up but, he's in a stable condition."

"Is he going to be okay?" The words blurted out of my mouth almost automatically and on any other day I would've felt like I had been rude but I just stared at her waiting for an answer.

"He'll need more than enough rest and possibly some therapy but other than that, he should be fine. Of course, we'll keep him here in the hospital for at least a week but he actually looked a lot worse than he really was; no serious injuries beyond some internal bleeding and broken bones, nothing that can't heal over time." I might've collapsed if it hadn't been for Kari holding me in almost crushing hug, which I returned with the same fervor. Before the doctor could walk away, I asked her the most important question.

"Can I see him?" Again, the doctor looked to me hesitantly.

"He's still asleep right now and we really should wait until his mother shows up…" I looked to the woman desperately and she sighed. "…I suppose you can see him though." I could've tackled the woman with my excitement.

"But," Ugh…there's always a but.

"Only one of you at a time can go in there until his mother shows up and I can talk to her about all the details. Moreover, you must be quiet and not rile him up in risk of disturbing any of his injuries. Is that understood?" I nodded to her in agreement and smiled my thanks. She nodded to all of us before making her way out of the waiting room. Taking a deep breath, I calmed myself and turned back to my friends and my sister; they all just smiled up at me.

"Go be with him Tai. You've waited long enough." Kari gave my hand one last tug before letting it go. At seeing the expressions on Izzy and Joe's faces, I didn't need another invitation. I gave them all one last big hug before turning on my heel and heading for Matt's room.

End.

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Well, the next chapter will be the last and hopefully everything between Tai and Matt will finally work out. They do deserve it after everything I've put them through I guess. 

Thank you for reading!! Please review. More reviewsMore Inspiration! (and also hopefully some better writing, eh?)

Any questions, suggestions, criticisms, praises; contact me!


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I do not own anything Digimon including the characters. I only own my own memories and emotions which are poured into the story.

Well folks, I'm finally here to deliver the final chapter of Discovering College. I know, it's been years, too many, and I'm sure many if not all of the fans have moved on from all of this. I can't apologize enough for the long wait. I abandoned my writing for a long time and I wanted to come back it but just never could. Well, low and behold, I've been back to writing for a while now and reading other fictions as well. I happened to read this story last week; I had forgotten how good it was, not to toot my own horn or anything, but I just connected with it so much all over again. And recently I've discovered how much I hate reading a story that doesn't have an ending! So, it might not be the greatest writing I've ever done, but I decidedly whipped up this final chapter so that everything and everyone, including myself, could have some closure. I hope even after all these years it still connects with the rest of the story.

Thank you to each and every one of you for reading! I appreciate it more than you know.

Without further adieu, here is the last chapter of Discovering College!

_Italics _signify Matt's dream

Chapter 8 – Tai's POV

I quietly walked into his room and frowned. White surrounded Matt; the only color was his blonde hair and even that had lost its usual shine. He was sound asleep but he had a frown on his face. I made my way to his side and gently sat down on the bed next to him. I took his hand in mine and closed my eyes. If I could've willed him awake right then I would've. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes and I clutched his hand tighter.

I stared down at his still form. We had been through so much from trying to figure out what was happening between us to fighting for our lives against his father. I couldn't think about losing him again. I remembered the night he came and found me at the party and how stupid I had been. I realized even more now why Matt had been so upset. How could I have done that to him? I couldn't stop the tears from falling now.

"Oh Yama..." I paused to keep my composure. "You have to beat this Yama and come back to me…you're so strong, you've been put through so much all by yourself…but I won't leave you alone ever again!" I longed to see his blue eyes open but it seemed hopeless.

_I'm dreaming…I must be…I can't be back here again._

_I was lying on the ground in my apartment; the air was stale but I could still smell the distinctive stench of beer. I was breathing but I couldn't move. I can hear people nearby. Suddenly Tai is leaning over me; he has his usual grin on his face but something's wrong. He's frightened. His voice his shaky but he speaks to me._

"_Matt…I have always loved you. It might've taken me a while to realize it but it's the truth…hopefully I'm not too late." His voice changed then; he got more serious. "Yama, please come back to me. You just have to open your eyes. I'm right here waiting for you."_

My heart skipped a beat; did Matt's eyes just flutter? It was then I noticed the small beads of sweat forming on Matt's forehead. Was he dreaming? Could he actually hear me?

"I don't know for sure but I'm sure as hell gonna keep trying; come on Matt! You can do it! I'm here for you!"

_A shadow fell over us and I felt immediately uneasy and in so much pain. Tai was away from me now. Tai was fighting something; someone maybe and I couldn't help him anymore. I wanted to help him._

"_Stay away from him!" Tai's voice was so far now. I felt weak and I couldn't breathe anymore. Suddenly everything went black. Now I feel warm like everything will be okay. There's no more pain. But where is Tai? I start searching for him. I can move again and I start running. All I see is black, no Tai to be found. Did my father kill him? I can't believe that! I keep running. Suddenly I see a bright light. It hurts my eyes. Pain comes rushing back to me._

_I open my eyes._

As soon as it started, Matt seems to stop responding and my stomach drops. I can't help but release a sigh; I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up to begin with I guess, he was in surgery for so long it would be a miracle if he was already waking up. I close my eyes and lift a hand to pinch the bridge of my nose. I guess it's going to be a long night.

"Tai."

I whip my head up at the small voice and my breath catches in the back of my throat. There staring up at me are those eyes, those wonderful blue eyes. Matt smiles as much as he can at me and I can feel so many more tears welling up but I don't care if they fall. My Yama is awake he's okay.

"Are you okay Tai?"

"Matt!" I can't help myself; I jolt forward and pull him into my arms. "Oh Matt I was so worried. I can't believe it!"

"Tai!" His muffled voice finally gets my attention; I thought I heard something before, and I immediately realize what I've done and release him.

"I'm sorry!" I frown at the grimace on his face but he holds up his hands to say he's fine. He takes a breath as he readjusts himself in the bed; it obviously hurts him but he tries not to show it on his face. Then, in true Matt style, he carefully runs a finger through his hair to fix it. He chuckles and smiles up at me and I'm overwhelmed with all the emotions I'm feeling; joy, utter amazement, relief and most of all love. My voice is just above a whisper, "Always got to look perfect."

"Not anymore I guess…" I gave him a look, raising my eyebrow and he smiled in return. "I'm a taken man so I don't need to look good for anyone but you." My small smile turns into a grin at his statement. After all this time, the fighting, the pain, we were finally going to be together.

"And with that mop on your head, it won't be hard to look better than you." My jaw dropped; I guess this is what it would be like being with Matt. He grinned mischievously at me.

"I'll get you for mocking my hair again!" I was just about to tickle him when suddenly Matt's eyes went wide with shock. I almost asked him what was wrong but he spoke.

"Mom…" I turned my head around and saw Ms. Takaishi standing in the doorway of the room. She stared forlornly over at us and I could tell she had been crying moments before. She placed her bag on the chair near the door and began walking towards us. She went on the opposite side of the bed as me and stared down at Matt. He looked up at her almost shyly unsure of what she was going to say to him. I felt like maybe I should leave the room but I didn't want to leave Matt either. Tears started steaming down the woman's face as she got a closer look at Matt and suddenly she leaned down and gently pulled him into an embrace.

"Son!" They both started crying then, Ms. Takaishi over her son's appearance and Matt over the acceptance of his mother. Matt had told me before that he never thought his mother wanted or loved him after the family split up but as much as he resented her for that, I knew he always loved her. I smiled at the warm moment and was about to make my way out of the room when suddenly I was pulled into a hug. I made a surprised noise and grunted as the grip put pressure on my ribs but I tried to smile and hug Ms. Takaishi back.

"Are you alright Tai?" I nodded and she continued to hug me, "Thank you, I'm so grateful for you being there to keep Matt safe." I felt my cheeks become warm and she finally released me and sat down on the bed next to Matt.

"I can't take the credit…I wish I could've been there sooner…" I trailed off and frowned but Ms. Takaishi put a hand on my shoulder.

"Don't even go there Tai…you saved my son from death…from that evil man!" She looked thoughtfully down at Matt and he frowned. "Oh Matt…if I had only known earlier, I would have fought for you." Tears streamed down Matt's cheeks and my heart broke for him. He's endured so much; his family splitting apart, his father convincing him that no one would ever love him then beating him up for no reason and now learning everything he ever knew was a lie. I couldn't help but think it would take a lot for him to recover from all of this. Ms. Takaishi placed a hand on his shoulder.

"But I won't let anything bad happen to you ever again. You hear me son. Never again." She smiled warmly at him. "So first thing, once you're out of the hospital, you're coming to live with TK and me." Matt looked up at her completely shocked but she continued, "And next fall you'll be back to college."

"Thanks Mom." Matt sounded extremely grateful and again I felt a little out of place in their conversation.

"But for now all I want you to focus on is resting, you got it?" He smiled at her and nodded. She gave his shoulder a small squeeze and stood. She turned to me again and nodded her thanks before walking out of the room. I turned back to Matt.

"Wow…that was…" I trailed off when I saw Matt crying again. Without another word, I scooted toward Matt so I could lie down next to him. I pulled him close to me and began rubbing his back softly. He reached up and wrapped his arms around me the best he could and just let everything out. After a few moments, I could hear his sniffles becoming fewer and I looked down at his head. He sniffled again before looking up to me. I smiled at him before leaning down and gently kissing his nose. He couldn't help but smile back then he lifted his chin and pressed his lips to mine. I breathed a sigh of relief; I had wanted this for so long and now it was mine again. I greedily kept his lips on mine kissing more fervently. I gently cupped his chin in my hand pulling him even closer; he responded by flipping his tongue over my lips. Our kisses grew more intense until suddenly I was light headed. I didn't want to but I pulled back slowing down a bit before pulling away entirely and staring into his eyes. I wiped the tears off his cheek with my thumb and smiled.

"Well…uh, I guess we should've knocked…"

Our mood killed, I whipped my head around and found Joe and Izzy standing in the doorway. Realizing the compromising position we were in I started pushing myself off the bed and eventually falling onto the ground.

"Ow…that hurt…" I rubbed at my sore rib cage and head. Above me, Matt's head appeared with a concerned look.

"You okay Tai?" I gave him a smile.

"Peachy keen!" My voice cracked as I spoke. I sighed and hoped the dizziness would leave me soon. Joe was by my side extending a hand to me and I let him help me up. Suddenly I remembered why I fell in the first place.

"Um…we were just…I…we…" My cheeks were burning and Joe was just standing there smiling at me, Izzy too! What the hell was I gonna do? I could try to run for it I guess but then Matt…oh god…what is that noise?

"TAI!" Suddenly I realized that Joe was in front of me gripping my shoulders; he looked a little annoyed, which meant he had probably called my name more than once. He let me go and shook his head.

"Tai, you don't have to explain."

"Wha-?"

"We already know about it. We've known for a while now actually." Izzy spoke that time and started walking closer to us. I looked over at Matt who shrugged his shoulders at me; then, it hit me.

"Sora…" Joe made a face.

"Yeah…she spilled the beans to us a while back. She told us about that night at the party and the next day at the diner."

"Big shocker, she was drunk at the time." Izzy frowned at his own statement. "She sure has changed." We all took a moment and agreed. I sat down at Matt's side again. I grabbed his hand and looked into his eyes. He smiled at me and squeezed my hand; I think we were both relieved in a way that our friends already knew.

"I mean, I'll admit, I didn't necessarily believe her because of how she's been recently but at least she prepped us for the real thing." Joe smiled and chuckled in his nervous kind of way. "But just so you know, we're always happy for you."

I smiled at both of them, "Thanks guys, we really appreciate your support."

"Matt!" Everyone turned to look as TK ran to Matt's side shortly followed by Kari. I smiled at my sister and stood to join her. We looked on as TK leaned in to give Matt a hug. They both had huge smiles on their faces; it had been forever since I'd seen them together. I guess all that would change now since Matt was moving in with his mom. I guess many things would be changing now. I couldn't help but smile at the thought. After everything I've been through now, I think can handle just about anything even dating the great Yamato Ishida.

Five months later

After stuffing in the last piece of luggage, I slammed the trunk of my car shut and looked to my left. Wiping the sweat from my brow, I couldn't help but smile. Matt was fidgeting while Ms. Takaishi fussed over him.

"Now Matt…be careful, and don't go anywhere with someone you don't know, and you can always call me for anything, and…"

"Mom, I know. I have been to college once before you know." I walked up to them and flung an arm around Matt's shoulders. Off to the side, TK rolled his eyes at me and his mom.

"Don't worry; I'll always have my eye on him. I'm pretty good at keeping him in line." I winked at her but she didn't seem to think it so funny. Ignoring me completely she pulled Matt into a crushing hug.

"I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too Mom."

I smiled at the moment. It had taken a lot of adjusting for the both of them but once Matt moved in with Ms. Takaishi and TK, he knew he was home again with a family that truly loves him. Then there was me of course. It was a shock at first for his mom when Matt told him about us. She was extremely confused and questioning of it all but once TK told her that I made Matt happy she seemed to let it go for the greater good. After a quick hug from TK as well, Matt turned to me.

"Ready?" I grinned.

"Of course!"

We climbed into my car and Matt waved to his mom and brother as we drove off. He sighed and settled in for the drive. I looked over to him and watched him stare out the window for a moment.

"Are you ready to do this again?" Matt scoffed.

"As ready as ever I guess. I can tell you one thing though," He paused to make sure I was listening. "You're not dragging me to any more parties with you. We have got to do well this year after failing out." My jaw dropped.

"Yama, I took plenty good care of you the first time, I'm offended!"

"Yeah, and the next party I crashed was real fun too." I shut up with that comment; I hated when he used that against me. He leaned in a kissed my cheek.

"I'm just kidding Tai. You know I've forgiven you." I sighed in relief.

"So we can party?" He gave me a look. "Just a little?" I pouted.

"You're impossible."

"And that's why you love me!"

End

Thanks everyone! Hopefully more stories to come very soon!


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